| OCR Text |
Show WOMEN IN BUSINESS RT-MIND "SELF-MADE MAN" OP AN EXPERIENCE. One of George Horace Lorlrner'l "Letters" That Combines Humor and Wisdom His Final Solution of a Great and Vexing Problem. I never do business with a woman that I don't think of a llttlo incident which happened when I was first married to your Ma. We set up housekeeping house-keeping in ono of thoso cottages that you read about In the story books, but that you want to say away from, when it's up to you to llvo In one of them. Your Ma did tho cooking and I hustled for things to cook. It wa9 pretty rough sailing, you bet, but ono way and another wo managed to get a good deal of satisfaction out of it, becauso wo had made up our minds to tako our fun as we went along. With most peoplo happiness Is something some-thing that Is always Just a day off. But I havo made it a rule never to put off being happy till to-morrow. I was clerking In a general storo at that time, but I had a llttlo weakness for llvo stock, even then; nnd whllo I couldn't nfford to plungo In It exactly, ex-actly, I managed to buy a likely llttlo shont that I reckoned on carrying carry-ing through the summer on credit and presenting with n bill for board in tho fall. Tho first I know your Ma was calling him Toby, and had turned turn-ed him loose Answered to his namo liko a dog. Nover saw such a sociabio pig. Wanted to Bit on tho porch with us. Tried to como Into tho houso evenings. Used to run down Uie road squealing for Joy when ho saw me coming homo from work. Well, it got on toward November nnd Toby had been making tho most of his oportunittes. I reckon I was attached to him myself, in a sort ot a sneaking wpy, but I was mighty fond of hog meat, too, and wo needed Toby in the kitchen. So I sent around nnd had him butchered. When I got homo to dinner next dny, I noticed that your Ma looked mighty solemn a3 sho set tho roast of pork down in front of me, but I strayed off, thinking of something else, ns I carved, and my wits woro off wool gathering suro enough when I said: "Will you havo a ploco of Toby, my dear?" Well, sir, Bho Just looked at me for n moment and then she burst out crying cry-ing nnd ran away from tho table. But when I wont after her nnd asked her what, was tho matter, sho stopped crying and wns mad In a mlnuto all tho way through. Called me a heartless, heart-less, cruel cannibal. That seemed to relieve her so that sho got over her mad and began to cry again. Begged mo to taKo Toby out ot picklo and to bury him In tho garden. I reasoned with her, and in tho end I made her seo that any obsequies for Toby, with pork eight cents a pound, would be a pretty expensivo funeral for us. But first and last she had managed to tako my appotlto away so that I didn't want any roast pork for dinner or cold pork for supper. That night I took what was left ot Toby to a storo keeper at tho Crossing, Cross-ing, who I knew would bo ablo to gaze on his hams without bursting into tears, nnd got a pretty fair prlco for htm. I simply mention Toby in passing, as an example of why I believe women weren't cut out for business at least for the pork-packing business. I'vo had dealings with a good many of them, first and last, and it's been my experience that when they've got a weak caso they add their sex to it and win, and that when they've got a strong caso they subtract sex from it and deal with you harder than a man. They're simply bound to win, either way, and I don't llko to play a gamo where I haven't any show. When a clerk makes a fool break, I don t want to beg his pardon for calling attention to It, and I don't want him to blush and tremblo and leak a llttlo brine into a fancy pocket handkerchief. A llttlo chango Is a mighty soothing sooth-ing thing, and I llko a woman's ways too much nt homo to care very mucn for them at tho olllco. Instead of hiring women, I try to hire their husbands, hus-bands, and then I usually havo thom both working for mo. There's nothing noth-ing liko a woman at homo to spur on a man at tho ofilco. From "Lottera from a Seif-Mado Merchant to His Son," by Gcorgo Horaco Lorimcr. By permission of Small, Maynard & Co., Publishers, Boston, Mass. |
