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Show THE CHAMPION. The shades of night were falling fast When through a town the champeen passed. He stopped the train upon his way, And halted long enough to say; "Jioosit Pills! ' " "O, say not so! " the yokels cried. "Stay here a moment and abide And, tell us how you jab and clout. We do not care a darn about 'Hoosit Pills! 1 " "I fain would .stay' the champeen cried, "But T am handcuffed, roped and tied. Though I would rather jab and clout, Mv contract forces me to shout: 'Hoosit Pills! ' " "I used to be a common pug And loved to clinch and hook, and slug. 1. won a title one sad day, And now 1 have to rise and sav: 'Jioosit Pills! ' " "I travel with a vaudeville show As all who read the papers know, But what has caused my sudden rise In health and strengtli and wealth and size 1 'Hoosit Pills! ' " "Although I long to start a fight, And yearn to swing my trusty right And spill a lot of ruddy gore, I am an advertisement for 'Hoosit Pills! 1 " Greece is safe with Xicolas Dimitra-copulos Dimitra-copulos on the job. Kick can string his name along the border and let the other fellows trip over it. If Greece can fight the wav Knock-emstiff Knock-emstiff Brown does, there will be a lot of broken knuckles iu southern Europe. M. Itchas, a member of the Russian duina, is in our midst. Considering the prevalence of whiskers in Russia, wc don't wonder that M. Itchas. John McGraw, we read, has built no a new team. He evidently wanted Heine Zim for a solid foundation. It is almost impossible these days to take a slant at a sporting page without learning that another ball player has fractured a leg. Baseball is recommended recommend-ed by all our leading surgeons. It is impossible, according to science, to make something out of nothing, and vet the Browns have an average of over !500. Nobody believes in hypnotism any more, but Fielder Jones made, the Browns believe they were a big league team. From a football expert's dopo in a p. m. paper: "Looking over the list of aspirants, one finds Irish, Italians, Poles. Swedes, Germans, Jews, negroes, Greeks and a few Americans." It seems that there still are, a few Americans left in America. Footballically speaking, Jim Thorpe was the greatest American. In his prime he was an ail-American football team. Boxing fans have discovered that Bob Moha can fight. One of these days they will discover that Columbus discovered America. It is possible, in these days of advertising, adver-tising, to be too good to make good. Ability to fight does not necessarily make a-chnfurdon. A good press agent can make a champion out of a cripple. |