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Show i "t : ! I A Lim o' Tvpe or Two ! I i Tav ce que vouMras." j j Ey 3. L. T. I A Cookhire Lad. 1 VI. V.'l-f.n I i ?...:;v : V.f k My hand, and prais- d my pluck, t-ii- i.'.-.i v.,r ii wu::a; Il.-o.-v, t-ii.; o:dy wished iv.ik. Ami these two ynrs, like friendly hires, f.'iwn ioivss t..o sa II'. r r : i 1 (: pl'.-.tsa:a. words .Anu chn.-:'ful i.i.vs K-r mc. Yet now Vvo :rac!v ! he homewa: d trip I see bu-r h-:e tota AYhv. -,vii -:h. a' AK.,.v hn her lio And 1 urn liur head away ". do tot-:. Mr. Tlvile r-poi'..s another Vie-dr who pla M i:- "Star SnirVd rainier."' The -war lias developed u ije.-.ti UL-iu 01' musical t u.ioit:. Just Fancy. Sir: When C. it. V:'..n Dyke of Sioux City had Ins wife's initials put on the new car he bought Iter, he forgot her first name is Lie. Picture the ?pooi ie.g tli-re is. Y S. "Speaking of wheezes," said Eob Lee, as we S'-a rchl for lus bail in an at re of oantlehons, "there is one lurking in the name of the i.'hir.f-F.c emissary. Air. K.x. I1o'c of peace, v a know, a.nd all i.ia.t mt." "The hrst tiling you can do." s-ud wo, "is to drop-anotiier ball-without penalty." pen-alty." ; Small Town Perils. (From the Ileiena, Ark., World.) Citizens are warned to keep off the streets when the now motor-diivcn hose w a Lion is mo ki 1 1 tr a ran to a t ire. The vtbiel is capable of great speed, and the practice of running to the middle of the stivt to "sr-a the fire wagon pass" should be discontinued from this time forward. Such r ra e tice w) !1 herea f let be at tended by considerable danger lo life and limb. Citizens tiiould remain wi'.htn doors, or ; at least refrain from running into the j streets when the new ho.se wayon is passing pass-ing to a fire. According to rhe Paris, HI., Beacon, "The LotLer- "Ole" is L'rom "Captain Paiius's Father's cartoons." Yo-u tt'e-meinbei' tt'e-meinbei' Old Bill Bairns. Reason-Unsettling Problem of Conduct. Con-duct. (From the F.riush Weekly.) Major tan SmyLhe stays at a hotel from Saturday to 'Tuesday. Bis bill comes to Ids, but. according to the tariff, it ought to have been 2 is. He is quite prepared to go back to the hotel and pay the difference, but he hesitates to do so in case the girl who made out the hill might get into trouble with the proprietor, proprie-tor, who struck him as being: -an ill-tempered fellow. hat should Major Smythe do? What was done, if anything, with Sec. Dnniels's suggestion that the Gorman cs-sels cs-sels ?.t Sea pa Flow bo "sunk with bauds playing and flags flying?" It seemed to us a capital way to reduce the number of German bands. Song. Over the bloom of the blossoming" clover, Up from t he spi ing-scented lane, Croons a warm wind singins over and over Ever a wistful refrain: "Bees in the meadow are busily humming, hum-ming, Ijife is as sweet as a song". Summer is coming", is coming, Is coming" vhy do you linger ho long?" Moonlight test night o'e-r the warm earth wan breaking, Moonlight and silvery , dew. Earth w;if asleep, but my heart was still waking, Calling and calling to you. "Summer has come to the hills and the meadows, Summer and sunlight and song. Winter and sorrow have fled with the shadows Why do you linger so lonr:?" GWENNETIi They may have some sort of soviet in Marshall town, la. Tennyrate, the Times-Republican Times-Republican reports that Royal Weineke and Elsie Bader have been "licensed to work." Imaginary Portraits. I'll Vet a nickel P. D. S. Is sleek and fat with joillness; Slings the slang like you and me, . And wines and dines right merrily. I'll bet a penny Eaura B. Is neither young nor fair to see, But round and comfy, sweeps and bf.Ues, Dusts, spanks then soothes with ginger cakes. I'll bet a doughnut our friend Pan Is a grey-headed also ran; Never knew the joy of woods A hotel batch with cranky moods. M. E. B. Thou, Too, Mater! Once I had a little boy, I named him P. D. S. I taught him how to say his words, And was proud of my success. But when I come to read the stuff He sends to B. L. T., And think 'twas I that started him Dear contribs pardon me! MOTHER (aged 80). A form of address neither too formal nor too fresh, and covering both sexes, was employed by a M issouri man who, writing to a company in Arkansas which raises hogs, chickens, etc., began: "Dear Breeders." Imagination Throws Up Its Hands. Sir: It was a May day, and a eray day. but the sun was made to shine for me when I observed from a car. window that ; Messrs. Gray Sc Dowdy are proprietors of a store handling dry goods and ladies' clothing in Eincoln, 111. Imagine the advertising ad-vertising man t rying to arouse interest in a line of Gray & Dowdy suits." R. C. "Eater." reports the New York Tribune, Tri-bune, "she U married Hugo. Fuhrman, a German artist." What Is known as a half-hitch, a slipknot,' slip-knot,' or what you will. "Eight years a;ro today,' writes C. C. G., "T was fired by the Glidd-n Varnish Co. for spend'ng their time a la P. D. S." There's a soulK-ss corporation! Tho Second Post. (Remarkable case of crowding reported to an insurance company.) Th;s is to adv:se ynu that I am just recovering re-covering from a case of flue. "Went to bed nea rly thr.-e weeks ncn. Was followed fol-lowed by my wife and daugiiter. then the office girl.' "Actions of Thornton seemed to Ind:-cn( Ind:-cn( e that he is mentally demented." Torre Haute Star. You might say lie was a little queer. One of our patient s, X. R., suggests that Mr. I.nrd;o-r na me it RingoiT ; but we dessay tills is not the first. Landed. (From the M::-:hn waka. Tnd.. Enterprise.) Announc.-ir,-"!- ha:; b.-en made u the man-iag'.' 'l' Alb -rt. '.uii-r of liiver Park and Miss Gladys lI..ok of Mishawaka. j S'-'p how the gods their g;fts allot! I What Germany draws is a Place in the I Shad I |
