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Show By TOM BL'SSELBERG North County Editor Drug abuse is an "emotional cancer." THAT'S THE two-word appraisal of one Davis County mother who knows-she looks back not very far to when her oldest son--now 17-was immersed ' CGHMCAIL deep inside the drug scene. - She can look back on it now speaking in calm, decisive tones, but there were days and months she ' says the drug activities of her son held such impact it could' ve broken up their marriage had they let it. THE SPEAKER is Myrna Feolo, a mother who says she's not afraid to use her name in support of ;1 ' fighting that "cancer" that struck her then-15-year-x old son, an occurance she says never was dreamed ), of. Here's her story, one that sounds more classic than not, of an incoming high school sophomore who 3 suffered two disappointments, he wasn't judged either sufficiently large or big enough to compete on C the Bountiful High School football team after playing years in community leagues and then was bumped off the junior ski patrol when the group was voted out. FACED WITH that "double disappointment !, John (not his real name), found sympathy in a new s support group, one that included the use of marijuana. mari-juana. "Before you knew it, I didn't realize some of II these friends he had had since the third grade were in !j that group-it was very difficult to say no, don t associate with them any longer," Mrs. Feolo said, fl She and the rest of the family saw a change m the 1 ! previously quiet, usually pleasant boy who did what he was asked as much as any 15-year-old. 1 : "INSIDE, I knew there was something really wrong, but so many of my friends would say he'sjust going through this 'teenage thing' but I felt there was a more to it since I had raised two others." ,) Some adults would tell her using marijuana isn't Armful, and the family had to pay $75 an hour for i several months to a psychologist who basically tried to bring home the same message. It got to where "I felt like almost a fool if I said anvthine." MEANWHILE, John dropped out of school, church activities and his family-for all intents and purposes, and it became a trial that Mrs. Feolo urges parents not to give up, although she can point to those parents who've said they can't wait for the day their child reaches 18 and can leave home. The drug problem, though, affects the entire family, fami-ly, not just the one, she emphasizes. "The whole family was in an uproar for a long time. We kept saying, 'Why, why?' as if he was very unusual. "HE FINALLY said, 'I'm with the "in" group and started talking. We found out most parents don't want to admit it. That's the hardest thing in the world but you can't fight it if you don't admit it." During those difficult times, it meant having family conferences with the other kids, but the drug problem prob-lem had to be dealt with, "just like any other disease," dis-ease," the youthful mother reiterated. "You have to try harder." "WE ALL individually tried" to work with John, she recalled, with her oldest daughter taking a weekend when just the two of them were home to initially engage in a shouting match that finally came to talking it out. "We just had to start listening to what he was saying. Usually you think it's (drugs) just a copout. Teens are so frightened of the future, and they don't realize that we are too." ALONG THE WAY, John got into some scraps with the law and it was some "tremendous" probation proba-tion officers who've helped him through it all, treating treat-ing him sternly when that was needed. About a year ago, he landed a job at a fast-food restaurant in his neighborhood and has resumed school at another high school. If anything, his mother says the love between them supercedes that of "before" the problem. Town meetings have been set up for Nov. 10 at four locations. Here's the location, time and co-chairpersons co-chairpersons from whom further information may be obtained: Bountiful High School cafeteria, 7:30 p.m., Tibby Milne, 295-7866; Davis High, 7 p.m., Maxine Miner, 451-2561 or Olivia King, 451-5325; Layton High, 7 p.m., Ruth Pratt, 544-5865 and Clearfield Clear-field High, Kaye Williams, 776-5236 or Joann Barnes 298-3446. FAMILIES are urged to view the "Chemical People" Peo-ple" programs on Channels 7 and 1 1 , Nov. 2 and 9 at 7 p.m. in an effort to organize against drug and alcohol alco-hol use. |