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Show P DINNER 1FJ QUESTS' E- pfSS" onion 6ban" BSerft thine may be KJthoLehlgh Valley " iBsirs and spill a lot of cheap IKtrthc carpet while waiting SKhVjust exactly whero the Kkj in. but I suppose that ap- K present at the battle I LHfUtde Peter Grunt and Aunt fEtf Eswlcr ami his second tHae K-ler, Jennie, and her lms-iHS lms-iHS Wil.'on from Milwaukee. 4Kfrgct to mention that old Dr. Krr. the celebrated food cx-Etik cx-Etik pest of tho evcainc. JK&uder is a ureal friend of iBSr or other Vncle Gregory cot '.lne fitt tlmt Morty Smith had ,.uH('itie of Pommery, and long jfefc toner hour Uncle Greg com-jBWdsi com-jBWdsi in the pipes. 3HbU around 0 bard about the BBibt'I took him out in the piity; opeund a quart of tho skte,and let the old eeczer Blb .rvk Grej? came fo the snr-wKt snr-wKt jsned back into the parlor wRtixw tjnn singing t lie swan song from Lohengrin, but his idea of a swan was so much like a turkey gobbler gob-bler that loving friends had to put the moccasins to him and run him out of tho room. Then he went out in the butler's pantry, hoping to do another splash in the Pommery, but not finding any, Jio began to recite, "Down in tho Lehigh valley mo and my pcoplo gr,ew; I was a blacksmith, cap'n; yes, and a good one, too. Let me sit down a minute, a stone's got into my shoe." But it wasn't a stone. It. was potato salad which the Irish cook threw tit him for interfering with her work. After nil the excitement was over and link Greg was sleeping with magnificent mag-nificent noises on the sofa in tho librarj-, vour sister Jennie was coaxed to sing Tosti's "Good-by." Of course ;'ou know, Bunch, wc'ro all very fond" of your sister, but I'm afraid "if Mr. Tosti over heard her sing his " Good-by" ho would say: "The same to you. and hero's your hat." Beforo Jennie married and moved west I romomber she had a very pretty mezzo-concertina voice, but she's been so long helping Stub Wilson to make Milwaukee famous that nowadays her top notes sound like a cuckoo clock after it's been up all night. 1 suppose, Bunch, it's wrong of me to pull this on you about your own flesh and blood, but when a married woman with six fine children, one of them at Yale, slides up in front of the piano and begins to squeak, "Good-by, "Good-By, Summer." Summer! Good-by, Summer'" .-just as if sho were calling tho dachshund in to dinner, I think it's rime she declined tho nomination. Then Bul llawley, after figuring it all out that there was no chanco for his getting arrested, sat down on the piano stool and made a few sad statements, state-ments, which in their original stato form the basis of a Scotch ballad called VLoch Lomond." As yon know, Bunch, Bud's sj'stem of speaking tho English language is to say with his voice as much of a "listening With a Heart Pull of Pride." word as ho can remember, and then finish tho rest with his hands. You can imagiuo what Bud would do to a song with an oatmeal foundation like "Loch Lomond." When Bud barked out tho first few bars, which say: "By yon bonnio bank and by yon bonnie brae," you can believe be-lieve me. Bunch, everybody within hearing hear-ing would have cried with joy if tho piano had fallen over on Bud and flattened flat-tened his equator. And when he reached the plot of tho piece, where it says: "You tako tho high road and I'll tako tho low road," Undo Peter took a drink, Jack Mcrton took the same, Stub took an oath and I took a walk. ICever in my life, Bunch, havo I heard a song so roughly handled. And all the wliilc Bud's wife sat there with tho glad and winning smilo of a catfish on her face, listening with a heart full of pride whilo her crime-laden crime-laden husband chased that helpless song all over tho parlor, and finally left it unconscious under the sofa. Bud was ,iust about to pull tho cork from another ballad when dinner was announced and our lives were saved. I'm so unstrung over tho narrow escape, Bunch, that I'll wait until later to tell you about the eats which were what wo como for. With respex, J. H. |