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Show . 4 i Jr h I ""N. y ' -t- -' ' ----- 'V Teim (D'CDIkDdk WMsttll by David Fleisher Proposed Provo ski area triggers ban the bum campaign The developer of a proposed ski resort near Provo told area residents the resort would not attract ski bums like those at other ski resorts, according to a recent AP story in the Salt Lake Tribune. I think that's a rather interesting statement, and one that deserves some thought. Let's start with the basics: what is a ski bum? A simple definition of a ski bum is a person who takes off for the winter and spends most of his waking hours skiing. Sometimes ski bums work, sometimes they don't depending on weather conditions. They tend to be pleasant people who are prone to saying things like, "I need to work on my edge control," or "Hey, man, like mellow out." It's probably safe to assume that many ski bums enjoy hunting for attractive ski bunnies during a typical day on the slopes. They may also engage in other social activities, typically at night, not directly related to skiing. But who doesn't, and big deal if they do. Well, it's a big deal in Provo. In over 50 public meetings, according to the Tribune article, residents have expressed fear that the proposed ski resort would attract "undesirable elements" who would adversely affect the moral climate of Provo. And these undesirables are none other than ski bums. I think these Provo residents are afraid ski bums will turn their town into either the Love Canal or a society similar to Sodom and Gomorrah. They must think ski bums live off welfare checks during the day and rape women at night. I've met a few ski bums in my life, and none of them do that. Maybe they aren't certified ski bums. Park City's had a lot of ski bums over the years, and we haven't started building bomb shelters yet. The article also says "The Provo area has a high level of informal enforcement against such things as pornography... The (proposed) ski resort will bring in an alternate clientele who will dilute the amount of informal enforcement of social practices not against the law." Loosely interpreted, this means ski bums will tempt Provo residents into having more fun, and they apparently don't like that idea. Furthermore, the resort's developer said if the ski bum clientele does come, it will offer a challenge to parents: "Parents will have to train their kids to broaden perspectives," he said. Don' t most parents do that? W hy do parents need ski bums to broaden their children's perspectives? I think Provo is overreacting to the ski bum issue. Trust me, Provo, you will not resemble "The Day After if ski bums come to your town. You will not have to sandbag the town for protection, nor will you have to flee with all your personal belongings. Like it or not, ski resorts attract ski bums. Just think of the Golden Rule: "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Put another way, you be nice to the ski bums, and they'll be nice to you. And everything will turn out just fine. Sweet dreams, Provo. As I walk up Main Street I hear the Ten O'clock Whistle. II |