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Show Dear. Johnt t. John Waterbury I if I Question! or comment! regarding alcoholism, drug abuae, or the related life-problemi may be lent to, 36 South State Street, 1 1 it floor, Salt Lake City, Utah Mill. Thene letter! form the baiii of the "Dear John" column. Dear John" I have two young children, I'm divorced and scared to death of knowing I am responsible for raising them alone. Kids today seem so different than when I was young. Irresponsibility, acting out, drugs, etc., etc., etc. If this is what the new generation genera-tion is all about, I'm not sure I want the hassle. What to do? Too Late to Back Out Dear Too Late It's not too late to put things straight. In fact it's a lot easier to put them straight now than to have to straighten them out down the road. It's always easier to form the unformed than to reform the deformed, so don't be intimidated by the responsibility. Young kids need three things primarily to get off on the right foot: Love, discipline and high expectations. Love makes us feel secure and helps to develop self-worth. Discipline helps us direct and refine our abilities. It also helps to develop self-control. self-control. High expectations on the part of those we care about help us to reach out and achieve. We tend to measure up to the expectations of others, whether they're high or low. So don't give up. You're in the process of developing three things: two human beings, their future and your past. Dear John Le'ts see how objective you really are. I doubt that you'll print this one. I'm 17, with my whole life ahead of me and my parents can't seem to understand that I'm a person capable of running my own life. It should be up to me where I go and what I do. My friends and I drink a little. Some times a lot, but you only go around once. You'd think I was committing a sin. My Mom's always uptight about it. My Dad's always yelling. It's my life. I know when to stop. They're always trying to run my life. I wish they would get off my back. They must have forgotten what it's like to be a kid. I'm in control of me. When I get ready, I'll straighten up. But not now. Things are different now and I won't live their kind of life. They can't make me either. Living the good life Dear Living Who pays your bills? Who buys your food? Who pays the rent? With your kind of thinking, you've got a lot of problems ahead of you. Treatment centers, jails and cemeteries are full of people who thought exactly as you do now. There are two things you don't mention: Responsibility and respect. It appears you have neither. Odds are you won't appreciate them till you have a 17 year old who thinks as you do now. But then again, as you said, you only go around once. Too bad. Dear Readers In the magazine for the Lion's Club, "The Lion 1984," I found the following list. It was directed toward Lion members but seems appropriate for every group, religion, social or whatever. what-ever. TWELVE WAYS TO KILL A GROUP 1. Don't attend meetings. 2. Be sure to leave before the meeting is over. 3. Next day, find fault with the officers and committees. 4. Take no part in the Group's affairs. 5. Be sure to sit in the back, so you can talk to a friend. 6. Get all the Group will give you, but give nothing in return. 7. Never ask anyone to join the Group. 8. Talk cooperation, but never cooperate. 9. If asked to help on anything, always say you haven't the time. 10. Never accept an office; it's easier to criticize than to do anything. 11. If appointed to a committee, never give any time or service to the committee. 12. Never do anything more than you have to, then when others willingly and unselfishly use their ability to help the group along, yell and scream that the Group is run by a clique. Confidentially: What some people enjoy most about ping pong is stepping on the ball. |