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Show , . ! K f Four Corners j : I Mental Health w w ..A H1JMAN SERVICES CENTER" f KjQ Roger D. Christensen, MSW J : J : . r Anger and the fonJ People often feel that anger is bad and destructive. However, How-ever, depending on how it is expressed and how it is received we know not only can anger expression be emotionally emotion-ally healthy, but it is the start 1 of resolving conflicts and tension. ten-sion. Because of the frequent attitude that all anger is bad we often teach our families not to express anger, rather than to learn how to handle anger when it occurs. And, be assured that people cannot live together without feelings of frustrations and anger occur-ing occur-ing within us. Society teaches people not to show negative emotions. But everybody has them, even "nice" people. Try to make it safe for family members to express emotion. Recognize that people are not "bad" for feeling certain feelings, instead in-stead help them deal with or talk about the feelings that are making them feel bad. We often tell children "you shouldn't feel that way". However, if they do they do. Feelings are feelings. If your frustrated son says he hates school and wants to quit, he may be expressing honest feelings. Accept them and try to help him find out why he has the feeling. If you counter with logic "everyone has to go to school" you may only increase his anger and 1 lose the opportunity to heln him work it through. Learn to work through the I' anger and do something positive with it. Learning (0 r describe and talk about nega. tive feelings may keep from acting the feeling out. I Repressed anger frequently results in anger out of control which may be inappropriate f harmful, or destructive. Talking about your feelings' brings relief. It lowers emo.' tional temperature and brings the situation into focus. Once you've cooled down you can' v begin to look at your problem i rationally. Only then can you 1; begin to look for solutions that meet your real roeds and goals. |