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Show Self-esteem a critical skill student have to develop Students have the same basic needs as most people: acceptance, belonging, responsibility and recognition, rec-ognition, according to a newsletter recently published by the National Association of Secondary School Principals. "These needs are especially apparent ap-parent in students in grades six through nine when they are reaching out to become adults but still experiencing many traits of younger children," points out Laurel Kanthak, NASSP director of middle level education. ' 'The schools have a major role to play in this transition, but parents can also be supportive especially during the summer." The first task is understanding what early adolescents believe and desire in each of those four areas, according to Kanthak. Students have definite feelings and needs in these categories, according ac-cording to the newsletter: Acceptance: "People like me just the way I am." Belonging: "I'm part of a group; we are a family." Responsibility: ' I can be trusted, my input is valuable; I am capable of self-control." Recognition: "I am special, I am capable." If young people have difficulty growing in these areas, parents can structure activities during the vacation vaca-tion which will allow them opportunities oppor-tunities to develop skills while building self-esteem. "Another big plus is that the bonds between family members are likely to grow stronger. " Kanthak explains. Kanthak urged parents to look for selected opportunities where family members can do things together during the summer. "As children mature they want to do more things by themselves or with their friends," she said. "They do not want to spend all of their recreational time with mom anH dad. "However, it's still important to demonstrate that adolescents are valued members of the family. That security can be very important. Try to plan one or two activities each month where the family can participate par-ticipate together. This might include in-clude a camping trip, an excursion to the beach, or a trip to a sporting event or museum. "Involve your youngster in selecting and planning the activity. This will demonstrate that you value your student's input and that you know he or she is an important part of the family." Kanthak also urges parents to find ways to compliment youngsters for their success and contributions. "Certainly, as young people mature they make some mistakes, and parents, along with other adults, have a responsibility to point out better ways to handle those situations. situa-tions. But it's essential to show adolescents ado-lescents that we still believe they are good people and have many positive qualities. Summer can be a most appropriate time to strengthen a youngster's self-esteem when the pressures of school have disappeared. disap-peared. Make sure your child understands you know he or she is special and capable." As adolescents strive to develop responsibility, parents can support that need by providing opportunities oppor-tunities at home for them to contribute con-tribute to the family. "Cooking a meal once a week, being in charge of the newly acquired ac-quired family dog, or supervising a younger sibling show that parents believe the adolescent can be trusted and is capable. Not all of these activities will work with everyone, but parents can find something which interests their youngster. |