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Show The Park Record D Section B Thursday, September 1 5, 1994 D Page B3 I m . .. ' ',v Y-' 1 .' '4 t i V i I I A i ' i v,V - ' t irt mrni i wrili(iHniin Ed Harris and Melanie Griffith star as Dad and V respectively in this inane romantic comedy about a science teacher, his son and a hooker. Hollywood tries another hook by AMBER McKEE . Record staff writer Milk Money Starring Melanie Griffith, Ed Harris, Michael Patrick Carter, Malcolm McDowell Directed by Richard Benjamin Paramount Pictures 1994 Well, Pretty Woman it ain't. Actually, Pretty Woman wasn't much to write home about either. I haven't figured out Hollywood's obsession with Hookers with Hearts of Gold. Yeah, so if the average guy saw Melanie Griffith sitting on a street corner trying to make a little cash, he might want to help her out. (But then again, Hollywood already did that.) The average hooker is another story entirely. This movie is based on an asinine plot. Boy (Michael Patrick Carter) meets Hooker (Griffith). Boy wants to see Hooker's breasts, but wants a mother worse, so Boy introduces Hooker to Dad (Ed Harris). During all this all of Boy's friends see Hooker's (i.e. Potential Future Mother) breasts. Some of Boy's friends' fathers know Potential Future Mother's breasts intimately as well. Enter Bad Guy who kills HookerPotential Future Mother's Pimp and then tries to kill Hooker and Boy, while Dad tries to kill all of Hooker's ex's (i.e. Boy's friends' fathers). Get it? Oddly though, Griffith's sweet voice and demeanor and Harris' geeky widowed Dad make you want to believe it could happen. Griffith, as usual, runs around the whole movie in tight tops and dresses that show of her awesome pair of gams (legs). Poor Dad, who teaches science to grade-schoolers and tries to save the wetlands in his spare time, doesn't have a chance. He takes one look at V abbreviated from "Eve" and falls head over heels. Now, mind you, he thinks she is a math tutor. At least that's what Frank, also known as Boy, tells him. Actually, Harris is what makes the movie. Besides being the sexiest balding dude since Patrick Stewart, he is just terrific as a Sensitive Guy. Remember how he threw his wedding ring down the port-o-potty in The Abyss and then, changing his mind, had to dig around in the blue stuff to find it again. In Milk Money, Harris charges around like a mad scientist, gleefully identifying species of plant life and trying to fix Griffith's car by figuring out what isn't wrong with it. ("Well, we know it's not thetarter!") There is plenty of motivation for an aging hooker whose pimp has been murdered and who is , accused of stealing from the mob to want to move in and play house. What Dad wants with V, at least on a superficial level, is also apparent. What is hard to believe is that the situation could work out. There are also some awkward scenes involving Frank in one, he is assigned to give an oral presentation on the female reproductive system, complete with visual aids. (Guess who he brings with him to class....) Instead of being offended by them, I actually marveled that it would occur to someone to try and make them palatable on screen. In that sense, director Richard Benjamin succeeds. But, just like Pretty Woman, the "moral" the movie leaves you with is trite and inane. (I overheard two young girls having just seen the former discussing their future careers as prostitutes on Hollywood Boulevard in hopes of meeting Richard Gere. Good luck, girls.) Ultimately, Milk Money, which is rated PG-13, is a good-hearted piece of fluff with enough sexual humor to provide a couple of laughs. See it for Ed Harris or Melanie Griffith's body parts. What's Park City watching? September's top 10 video rentals at Park City Home Video 1. Four Weddings and a 6. Tombstone Funeral 7. ACE Ventura, Pet 2. Schindler's List Detective 3. Philadelphia 8. Blink 4. D2: The Mighty Ducks 9. The Pelican Brief 5. Grumpy Old Men 10. Reality Bites ' A v i IP ifr J' A Do You Suffer From Itchy, Inflamed, Cracking Skin? We have relief for you. If You have tried many treatments without success, our unique process has: Set medical fees All products are applied topically Satisfaction guaranteed or all medical fees refunded Why Suffer Any Longer? Call today for an appointment 1-800799-9688 out of S.L.C. 1-801566-9688 in S.L.C. AMERICAN INSTITUTE OF SKIN CARE 714 East 7200 South Salt Lake City NX A delectable series of Cooking Classes for a delicious fall season! Saturday, September 24, Southwestern Sensations 2 o' clock to 4 o' clock Southwestern favorites with fresh and testy ingredients. Thursday, October 6, Housemade Pastas and Sauces 4 o'clock to 6 o'clock A variety of fresh pastas and savory sauces. Saturday, October 22, Fall Soups and Salads 2 o' clock to 4 o' clock Hearty soups and salads for cooler weather. Presented by Executive Chef Mikel Trapp and Executive Sous Chef David Derfel. $30 per class. Call to register, 649-3700. Ask about upcoming cooking classes. ml Stein Eriksen Lodge The Glilretind, Utah's Best Sunday Brunch, Most Romantic Restaurant -1993 Zagat Survey. School e back in eeeeion. Please drive carefully. Chet Schneider former Park City Resident Mark Miller Subaru Salesman of the Year Honest Ethical Personable Come see the number one selling all wheel drive 1995 Legacy wagons and sedans Exceptional new lease program and previous owner additional Subaru discounts available 5UE3ARU. MARK MILLER SUBARU, INC. 649-2609 801-268-3734 3734 So. State SLC 1 1 , 'i' ' tl & If I i ' iv' ' , i Mr 1 ' ''', , '' , 2: ' . mtm V, j I I m3imJiji. .-Wf-..;-.fcW6e,j,f,, JSiWri'ifeiii-i' V 1 jU lf rr rr;; .TV-': HFMjpf1,-';. r I . lc; I! L r Ik t r?r ttri cpr EE, ER nr.E rmr- t, f . r- r t ' htiSiir -ri,x , H t mart tf n-n ArcMter conceptual rtndtnng of Summl Wctcn at Park Ciry. Soma modificattoni or changat may occui See What We've Done In Park City,.. And Become $100 Richer Experience the mountain-resort lifestyle from a privileged point of view with Marriott's Summit Watch at Park City. Marriott's newest ownership resort. Summit Watch features lavishly appointed accommodations, an exclusive Aquacade with indooroutdoor pool, and a Main Street location next to the Town Lift of the Park City Ski Area. To spoil yourself at our expense, you and your spouse need only attend our interesting and informative preview about the benefits of Vacation Ownership with Marriott's Summit Watch. As our thank you, we'll give you a $100 Gift Certificate redeemable rt Nordstrom or select Park City shops and restaurants. Call now and let us know when you will be coming for your personal preview. Some restrictions apply (see details of participation below). Please respond by calling Trisha on our courtesy line today. Courtesy Line 800-210-8200 (Some restrictions apply; see Details below.) SMI r Harriott's itnmif, "war AT PARK CITY Details of Partic'pation: This offer is sponsored by Marriott Ownership Resorts, Inc. to introduce its Summit Watch at Park City vacation ownership program. Yoi: must have an annual income of $45,000 or more and own your primaty residence. If married, both husband and wife must be present. Attendance at an informative presentation about Marriott's Vacation Ownership program is required. Presentation may be up to 90 minutes duration. Current Marriott Ownership Resorts, Inc. owners, owner's families, employees of Marriott International Incorporated, Host Marriott Corporation, Marriott Ownership Resorts Incorporated, owners of campers or recreational vehicles and previous participants in a Marriott Ownership Resorts, Inc. promotion within the past 12 months are not eligible for this offer. One offer per family, group or vehicle. Not valid in conjunction with any other offer. This offer is non-transferable. Single (unmarried) participants receive half stated offer. Upon completion of the presentation, you will receive a Gift Certificate for $1 00 redeemable at Nordstrom or select Park City shops and restaurants. Marriott Ownership Resorts, Inc. located at 80 South Main Street, Salt Lake City, Utah 84101 is the subdivider and an equal credit opportunity lender. This offer expires December 15, 1994. Have Instant Color Next Spring with Nature's Favorite Flowers Plant Wildflower Carpet this fall for beautiful flowers next spring and throughout the summer. Perennial Wildflower Sod 15 varieties of wildflowers Park City Nursery "We Know What Grows" Jp2 Stop by to pick up your Wildflower Carpet today 649-1363 lilil Lake Mountain Farms 1800-795-3236 |