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Show Big Barriers to Matrimonial BHss (Third In a Hrl of Thre Article on "MatrlinonUI Huta ') FAY ITIVINION, Copyrlahi i2t iNtw wk- Kvanlns Wwld), by Praia imbllahlna; v'o, Hava yuu allppad Into a matrimonial rut? to ynu aomttima think you am th unhppitat inarrt4 niaa or womvn tn the wurlUT If uu do, irlanr over the ntna rut which ihr of New York' moat promi-nm promi-nm omrn lawyara hava named aa f'.remoat cauaea for domeatlo unhappl-nraa unhappl-nraa r Mn Paulina O. Klald, head of tha abandonment bureau and a aetata nt to iMsttrlrt Attornry lUnton, pointed out the following ruta which aha beltevea moat datrurtlv toward marital hapulneaa; 1. (ttlnf that auperlur feeiluir. 2. Inability tu accept a h other aa they are. l. inability to awtna; tha pendulum evenly In regard to: Money matter; (bl h mtii I eiiKagHnienta; (c Holding one's tongue Mlaa Holfn P. WrCormUh, aaalstant dlatrtct attorney of Klna county. In a f ond Intervirw. cited thraa more ruta which aha believe many couplea fall into: 1. Jealouny Z. Not keeping In atep with each other. I. Not realising the valua of a aep-arute aep-arute vacation. Today Clartra Ma Hftrlht. one of New York's best known lawyers and tha first ai.d only woman who ever tried a general gen-eral court mart I. I ca during the war In Washington, points out threw outstanding ruts which she has noted tu her expcrl-tnce expcrl-tnce to Ins domestic rases: "I. Making man-lags tha and of things tnatead of the bealnnlng. "2. Trying to keep up with Uszle In-trad In-trad of enjoying the things within reach. "1. Avoiding that Jealous feeling be. rauae one la mora auccasaful than the other." "Whenever you a happily married couple." declared C'Uirtce M llarlght tn her offlco at No. 170 Broadway which she eharea with her huab.ind, (ieorge K Harlght, "depend upon It they have atacred rleiir of matrimonial ruts "It always seen.s to me when f look Into other people's Uvea and try to ae how I can patch them up that th most common rut they fall Into la th one that marriage la the end of things In-tesd In-tesd of the beginning. Moat women seem to think they can . fettle back In their limousines, their fir back chairs or tl:elr aub urban hammocks with a contented con-tented '.Sow I'm married. Im the world 1 whs; on! And most uahands who wish, they wrr bachelors again at tha end of a few years of married life aeern to be1 quite convinced that after they give a, woman a weddii.g ring and frame the marrlaice certificate that la the end. Mhe ' belongs to him and utcda no mora winning win-ning j "Hat marriage la Just the glnnlng of life for huxhand nnd wife, and he-: cause It Is the beginning they must both work like Trojans to malt It a huge ucceea. The moment either member of this new partnership of we. us and company' com-pany' lets down atid goea to nleeu, marital mari-tal happiness utkes a plunge for the ditch and gta caught in a rut from which It takes mucn bralnwork and maneuvering to extricate It. "Any woman who slis hack with tha !.et Oeoraa do It' attitude in putting the brakes on marriage and atoupjng tha progreca of a hippy, auccesnfui mar. rlage. And any mtin who thinks ha ran throw aside the bars nnd dlsrgmrd tha common courtesies and formalities which he employed while courting his wife for-gets for-gets that marriage, to be successful rc-qulrea rc-qulrea this same attitude nil through the1 long yeara which are 4o follow. I "Trying to keep up with Mule li an- j other rut which both husband and wife auffer from," continued Mr. Harlght. "Just because some other couples have a motorcar, keep a maid and ap.md fa more a year than their budget warrants Is no re it hod why Mary and John should follow th-in Into this rut. When husband hus-band and wlfs realise thev are tn a crowd which runa fur beyond their means th-y ought to hsve the courage to step aside und find othrr friends. To mort-Kufee mort-Kufee a home to buy a ear, to get behind In the rent to ,uy a new fur coat or diamond dia-mond ring. Is a aufe way of getting In a rut which grows die per and deeper ja'h yiar. "This Is nft exactly a mony rut; It's .1 rim IhI rut. a rut of 'What will Mia Somebody Kit, think?' or If Jackson can give his wlfr these things so can I," nnd It's one of the most danireroua ruts In the world for marital security. Hi.ppti.eM. unbounded at first. may apring from trying to keep up with the other married couplea. but sooner or later husband and wife ure golna to wake up. They are going to realise the truth, that they hava hern living fur other i paopla Instead of themselves. ! "Then there Is another rut. a very modern rut. which the woman of tha pretu-nt use Is very apt to (all Into." concluded Mrs. Haught. "That Is the rut of having her own husband JhIoub of h-r builuess bucccs!. Kometlnie, of coure, (t la Hpt to the other wiy. Hut this Is nn age of worntn and ram-petition ram-petition Many women bring In aa much IT not more than their husbands for a yearly Income. It takes a big broad man to s thir In the right lighu Anil It tukes a splendid, wiman woman to krep her head and not become inclined in-clined to overrate her success. "I don't believe thnt people who are unhappily married hsve really lost their oriKiiihl love for each other. 1 believe they have fallen inio a narrow, tiny rut of life iin.l only Utmw how to see thlntca their own way. Kemove this rut and they w:ll find that lov- that first flams which meant so much to themIs still burning." |