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Show ' A Line o9 Type or Two I j "Fay ce que vov.ldras." j V By B. L T. The First Flapper. (Ovid. Mt. 8. I.v3-:S5.) L-a.p dix.is, as ihe poet-sins, Staked h:s l:f on a pair o; wi:irs; Moulded feathers and wux w'.in care, Slaked Ms son lo a seeond piur; Fathered end leathered the iirst male tliti'i-'er. (Icarus was t'.v.s darling dapper.) Bent on rr.isir.g his child, 'tis said, lafc.1ah:s iixured t::e overhead. "Don't ty hig.i:" was the oi l man's word; ''Tr.i middle tourso for a downy bird. Ulrds that dip to the lower line Pick:e their wings in the par.ous brine." Did Icarus hearken to dear o'.d dad? No, sirrt-ts, but he wished he had, Soaring sunward the brash toy lilted; Molts the wax, and the feathers moulted. Flapping feebly each naked arm, Flops, weak flapper, in wild alarm Falls, poor chap, tn a choppy sea. (Daedalus salvaged the small debris ) FAX. Macauiay's New Zcaander, or V ill-pole's ill-pole's traveler from In ma, or Shelley's commentator from overseas would better be petting ready his London H ridge soliloquy. so-liloquy. Or all three of them might meet at the broken arch and moralize amid ihe ruins. In which case the conversation might run as follows: The New Zealander: "So that was St. Paul's!" The Commentator: Com-mentator: "Some human raee, believe me The Gentleman from I-dma: "111 Bay so." B Wins the Chocolate Sundae. Sirrah: To Fettle a bet: A fellow-contrlb says the Autobiography was interrupted because it imposed writing more than 3 per cent. I claim we were favored in the first place onlv to prolong an absence. "Which wins? ' V. W. S. Here's the reason: "Mr. Knopf, the alert publisher, writes us: "My friend Henry Sell tells me that you are writing your memoirs. If this is true," etc. Now, the word memoirs gave us a start. "Good heavens!" wc thought. "Can we be so old?" Besides, we had no means of knowing whether the consumers of this column were interested. Far be it from us, and so forth. i Try the City Directory. (From the Neenah, Wis., News.) What is a moran? That was the ques- ' tion asked by District Attorney D. K. Al- i len at Oshkosh, yesterday, when he was questioned as to how many "inorans" there were in Winnebago county. Mr. Allen stated that he had a new dictionary in his office, but 'that the word couldn't be found there. A Baltimore man, who has explored Africa, uenies that the gorilla can be trainej as a household help. You cannot make a cook or a second-maid out of a gorilla, he says, because the animal cannot be taught. Mebbe not. On the other hand, a gorilla would not spend half the day telephoning "ja-da, . ja-da" H another gorilla; although that line of conversation would not sound unlike the variety which we have all overheard. We Hope So. The More the Merrier. Sir: According to the Associated Press, the Bahia Blanco, the vessel concerning which Great Britain and Argentina are in dispute, has taken up a position off the River Platte. Do you think this invasion of our territory will embroil Uncle Sam? CALGLTROSUS. The actors' strike touches the imagination imagina-tion as no ordinary walkout can. We have a mental picture of John Drew parading pa-rading the Rlalto with a placard: "Remember "Re-member the Alabama Claims!" August. The harvest month is here, the golden grain Lies heaped like nuggets in the fields; between be-tween The marshalled shocks the aftermath in vain Entreats the stubble to be clothed with green. The dusty road, a ragged thread of gray Flung on the regal fabric of Karth's gown, Lures us to follow as it winds away Past field and forest, up the hill and down. Deep in the valley, here, a river flows Between the marshes stretching green and wide. Their rambling length no fruitful harvest shows, Tet they with August wealth are glorified. The milkweed at the water's edge droops down, Dull lavender, deep rose, and dusky green; The bergamot displays her purple crown, Tall cat-tails whisper softly as they lean. Here on a knoll the butterfly-weed rears The flaunting signal of his orange crest-; A living jewel on each tip appears Bright butterflies upon their honey-quest. Around the willows that the bitterns love Pink bindweed weaves a net of tangled grace; The timid marsh-wrens peer at us above The fairy fretwork of the Queen Anne's lace. On, on we go: there hangs a golden haze Above the shadows of the twilight hour. The dying crimson of the sun's last rays Is pale beside the vivid cardinal flower. The day is done, the night winds softly sigh. Our journey's end is near no whit too soon, v Now glows In the illimitable sky The lucent glory of the harvest moon. ' IRIS. We were sitting on the porch of the clubhouse at Brae Burn, listening to a discussion of the prohibition of Sunday golf at other courses. A gentleman who looked like a substantial pillar of the church offered his views. "Cut off your church subscriptions," said he. "That will put a stop to this nonsense." The Kansas Nut. (From the Wood River. Neb., Sunbeam.) The human nut acquires its richest and rarest flavor when grown on Kansas soil. Why all the squirrels do not emigrate to that state is an unfathomable mystery. Kansas has a "law" prohibiting the sale and circulation of any periodical advertising advertis-ing cigarets. In winter a regular boarder ; at a Kansas hotel may have blankets on 1 his bed; a transient may not. And now : Representative Campbell has introduced a bill in congress to compel President ! Wilson to remain on American soli here-I here-I after. Potatoes may grow small in Kan-i Kan-i eas, but there is nothing scant about the size and crop of filberts. As someone on occasion wittily observed, even a worm will turn. The ice dealers in and about Lynn, Mass.. stung by repeated re-peated intimations that their business Is prori table, "welcome an inquiry." When the investigating committee lias visited the hovels in which the ice dealers live, and has remarked their almost perfect destitution, a change in public sentiment will follow. "Freight Handlers Threaten to Quit." Headline. A happy little idea. Odd it did not occur to them before. A Grass Widower's Diet. (From the Janesvllle, la.. Banner.) Bob Allen is a grass widower. His wife and baby have left him. We knew all along they ought to, and thou eh t they would. Serves him right. They have gone for a week's visit in the southern part of the state, and if you rind h!m cranky forgive him, for Jt is the result of a craw full of cold parTeake, the natural natu-ral diet of a man running bachelor's hall. And that inverted bowl beneath the sky Of Washington, where bills are burn and not to it for leadership, for It Is impotent to lead a you or I. |