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Show Ho Signed the Meat Pledge. "Let's go over fo Feodum 's nnd get a big, juicy steak." "Can't do it;-I'm on tho vegetable wagon now." Substantial Seasoning. "It is unquestionably a fact that acidic fruit grew in the Garden of Eden." "Why a fact 7" "When Evo handed Adam tho apple, didn't it prove to bo a lemon?" Peace, but Jones adopted drastic measures to put an end to thc cat revelries in his back yard. ."Heavens!" exclainled a pnsserbv the next morning gating at the dilapidated dwellingi "Boiler explode?" "Nope; fed nitroglycerine to tho cat3 around my house last night, and ono of 'em crawled under tho stove." Prudent, at Least. Chauucy If a man insisted on standing stand-ing on j'oa toes in a stwect can, what'd yoa say 7 Clauncy I'd wait 'til he gawt; off, then I'd shout through thc -window: "Oh, you loffahl" Now Species. Weary I ecc's dat somo iiv doze bright guys hez diskivcrcd somo tubercular tuber-cular cows. Lonesome I wuu'der if dat Ml be any help in locatin' de missin' link? Not Indttstry. "It 's funny about mo nuld man ; ivory toimo 'c gets soused 'o thinks 'e's n swell, an' 'as mooney an' sich loiko." "But, hp's a very' industrious man. Only the other morning hc was up at daybreak turning the clothes wringer for you." "Nit! 'B war soused ngin an' thought 'o war crnnkin' an aterino-bed." aterino-bed." Another Point Gained. Ho Woman's suffrage I Bahl I Offspring Mamma, I want a nickel! She You seo, oven the child roalizes woman's superiority finance. Law vs. Mifflin "I'd like to see thfj tho family." "If yez mean me auwR If yez mean th' boss, Tribune Wuti Bell Main 5200. . J1 |