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Show The Salt Like Tribune, Sunday, January 11, W7 !' Social interactions of more popular children By Ann M. Berghout Austin, Fh D. Assistant Professor, Family and Human Development Department Utah State University LOGAN When we speak of socially rejected children in an elementary classroom we think we are talk- - Mr. and Mrs. Matticks Buckley-Mattic- ks Deborah Sue Buckley and H. Lance Matticks were married Saturday in St. James Episcopal Church. A reception was given at The Old Meeting House. The bride, a daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Robert E. Buckley, Salt Lake City, is employed by Bonneville Group, Inc. The bridegroom, a son of Mrs. Kathryn Matticks, Kaysville, and Mr. and Mrs. Harold Matticks, Ogden, attends the University of Utah where he is majoring in finance. so totally isolated that they have no friends or play- - iDr. Austin mates at alt but who are not a preusually children ferred playmate in the classroom have at least a few chums with whom they feel camaraderie. Based on some of my most recent data, what seems to make children accepted or rejected (in the scientific sense) is not whether they have friends, but whether they establish dren and used more conversational facilitators, or statements produced especially to keep the conversation moving Rejected children used the same kind of communication devices as popular children, but rejected children used more of them, particularly when playing with their friends To us this suggested that the interactions of rejected children are more intensive than the interactions of more popular children. Too Uncomfortable? Is this what makes them rejected? Is it too uncomfortable for others to engage in such focused communication? Or are we looking at an issue of preference? Perhaps children move toward a popular or rejected mode out of preference for interactive style. Some may prefer to be more extensive interactors while others may prefer a more intensive mode. It is possible that many rejected tilted 48 children (12 popular and 12 rejected from each grade) for further study. The children were matched with one of their closest friends and with a nonfriend a child for whom they neither expressed preference nor dislike. They were then videotaped as they played with these children individually. Types of Conversations As we analyzed the data we were particularly interested in the types of conversations both popular and rejected children had with their playmates. We found that both rejected and popular children attended to the conversation and said Uiings which facilitated it, or kept it going. Rejected children, however, appeared to attend more heavily to the conversation, perhaps even overattended, particularly when playing with their friends. Rejected children initiated more conversations with their friends than more popular chil tltMii ip extensive rather than intensive uals should they choose to or need to As researchers, we assume that If these children can get along well with all kinds of children, but choose 10 limit themselves to intensive interactions with a few close friends, their choice of lifestyle should be respectr children are not truly rejected but seern to have a smaller and more intensive interactive circle because they like it that way For a long time we have had a fallacious assumption that if a child were not popular, the youngster was a failure. This is not always so. It is true that some rejected children are in great pain. Everything that can be done should be done to help them. But many children do not know others consider them rejected They live in a happy world of one or two friends and are comfortable with this. Not Inadequate They should never be made to think they are performing inadequately. The major concern that parents and teachers should have with these children is whether, with all their intensive communicative style, they have sufficient communication skills to bridge many social subsystems and to interact with all types of individ ed. Calling them rejected is probably a misnomer, Rather than placing a value judgment on friendship patterns through labels of rejected" or popular, we need to differentiate whether individuals have an extensive but universally functional interactive style or an intensive but universally functional style. I 50iDAW(XD TRKimifc AOOC.OT WHAT ASf ( D WANT-AD- S 237-200- 0 " p ifif friendship interactions and networks. Intensive Friendships Usually, rejected children establish intensive friendships. This means that rather than extending themselves broadly, children who are considered rejected seem to concentrate intensely on a few friendships. Even their conversations with these friends seem to follow patterns of intensiveness. On the other hand, children who are more popular extend themselves to others in the classroom in a more extensive fashion. They use a communicative style which is significantly different from that of rejected children. Mr. and Mrs. Zeidner Jackson -- Zeidner Several colleagues and I interviewed 240 third- - and sixth-grad- e children about their friendship preferences and from this group we iden- - - SACRAMENTO, Calif. Lydia Anne Jackson and Thomas John Far-re- r Zeidner, both of Sacramento, were married Dec. 7 at the Morning Glory Inn. A reception was given after the ceremony. The bride, formerly of Salt Lake City, a daughter of Mrs. Margaret D. Jackson, Salt Lake City, and the late Douglas A. Jackson, graduated from the University of Utah. She affiliated with Kappa Kappa Gamma. The bridegroom, formerly of Salt Lake City, a son of Col. (U.S. Army, ret.) and Mrs. Robert F. Zeidner, Salt Lake City, graduated from the U. of U. He affiliated with Beta Theta Pi. 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