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Show I How quiet it must seem in East Africa Af-rica now! The Dcscrcl "News lias aain heard its polygamous master's voice. Itfr. Eooscvelt appears also to have learned how to capture the political panic. If the girls will insist upon wearing long hatpins, lot 'cm have a knob on each end. One thing about pla3"ing the horse races is that one need, not do so unless '! one so desire. Our visiting lavmcn look as good as their word and as the work the' propose- to perform. Senator Hepburn will, of course, be careful not to burn up tho forests as he did tho forest service. Now watch for something like "Colonel "Col-onel Tcddyvclt used none but Bear's Hope whilo in Africa. ' Doubtless tho barnstormer would not ', object io being called a "ham" if he 1 could bring a similar price. There arc some persons who wouldn't caro if Mr. Rockefeller started' right, in to actually throw his money away. Tt is not anlicipatcd that when -Mr. Ballinger begins to loosen up there will bo an- impediment in his speech. Some of those now style hats may bo callod dreams by I he dear girls, but tho men folk look upon them as nightmares. That famous two-horned rhinoceros at tho New York Zoo died the other day. Had ho heard that tho Colonel was on the -way home? Salt Lake's street- are- nmong the widest in tho country; but a few of those new style hats in them necessitates necessi-tates considerable dodging. ' "A. woman's club is never a big stick," avers the Dcscrct News. But as an effective weapon of defense and ofi'enso there is some class to tho rolling pin. . Upon leaving for Europe, .Tim Patten talked ver' much as if he was opinionated opinion-ated to the effect that there would bo no , wheat to corner without Patten to cor-j cor-j ner it. ' "Butchery of Bills at Springfield," announces the Chicago Daily Ncwa. They've been trying for a long time at Washingtou to politically butcher one particular Bill. At an' rate, that sensational society news from ilnnsns City ought to have tho helpful effect of causing every dc-cent dc-cent man to prefer a good wife above ! all the millions in wealth there urc on ' cartb. March camo in Iiko a Iamb, but since tho groundhog pulled off Mb big lizzie, we shall refuse to believe- that March will go out like a lion until wo hear H' tho necessary roar toward the ond of the month. Since this. fine weather has been con- Hj tinned for as many days as should suf- fl j fico to show that ho is in earnest about the arrival of spring, we are now pro-pared pro-pared to Bay that Zipping Zion has i . also the best weather man on earth. John J- Murphy, a lubor leader in Philadelphia, threatened to make stronms of blood flow through the streets. Jt is altogether loo bad that such uinviso men are placed in positions posi-tions whoro they injure this en use of labor more grievously than do ilio corporations cor-porations against which labor battles. |