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Show THR LADIES. A Missouri girl washed all day, ate twelve boiled ejres for supper, and then danced all night. "A largo number of marriageable girls" Detroit sighs for, while Lowell, Mas?., longs for polygamy. Some one has said that "the noblest thicg on earth is a man talking reason and his wife lib te mug to bim." The Austriaus have no divorce laws, but take them out on the cliff to view the suuset. They separate in their fall. Ninetj-seven ruad mothers, at a New Orleans prize baby bhow, where ninoty-eigbt plump darlings were exhibited. exhi-bited. Cooing ia well enough before mar-riano, mar-riano, but the billing doesn't generally ooojo till after; and then it comes from the grocer. Ten blows with aa ox-gad for his wife whenever a man in Turkey puts on a clean shirt aud Hods a button mistUQg. The barbariaufl "Ten thounaod dollars and happi-DOss," happi-DOss," is the way a Florida girl advertises adver-tises for a husband, who must be educated edu-cated aud possess a like sum. , A party of "young ladies" was recently re-cently dispersed by tho police at Springfield, Spring-field, Mass , fur disturbing a newly married couple with a ttu-pan serenade. seren-ade. Kate Love of'Oiaoiuiiati, lost one ol her logs in n cider pruss, and she is now looking far aud wide for a one-legged one-legged hubljaud, not over thirty years of ae. Kate Williams of Peoria, Illinois, knocked her lover flat on the grouod because he insisted upon kissing her tho third timo at the garden gateon a moonlight night recently. Two was her limit. A selfish California minister recently refused to perform a marriage service where the bride was his own absoonded. wife. And that aggravating woman said that he "wag just as mean as he alwayB used to be." Love induced a young girl, during a recent oold spoil in Minnosota, to strip off all , her clothing and spread them ovor her lover, who had sunk exhausted exhaust-ed at the wood-pilo, She kept herself warm by danoiDg about hor bed room. Her lovor was saved. A bride and groom prospective had a grand fracas on their wedding evening even-ing concerning the arrangement of the lady's hair, which finally ended by the groom leaving in high wrath, and the ceremony being adjourned sine dio. What a Lucky eaoapo those two had. A Massachusetts woman appcarod at the shop where her husband is employed, em-ployed, a short time ago, and apologetically apolo-getically said: "Jim is not well. You must excuse him from ooming to work to-day. Ho and I had a little difficulty diffi-culty at the breakfast tabie this morning, morn-ing, and ho won't be able to work thia week. A Wisconsin school-ma'am demands $1,000 each for four kisses stolen from her by a freight conductor. She missed the paaseuger train, and rode in the drover's saloon of a freight train, and this conductor took hor hand in his, threw his musoular arm about her slender waist, and did the damage aforesaid. We know of nothing so susceptible of porversion as the efforts of a youDg man to kill a mosquito on a young lady's la-dy's cheek. A censorious world would never forgive him for trying to Bcize it with his teeth when any less extraordinary extra-ordinary method would do juBt as well. And yet, it is said that in New Jersey no gallant of sound incisors ever adopts any other method. Lnve tlioro a girl wiili tonl ao dead, Who nevor to herself bulb said, Wou'illinvodaiuask wlion I'm weJ, And buuiatiUhud piilowi fur each bed! |
