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Show The Salt Lake Tribune UTAH Sunday, BARBERL Today I don’t have any answers, only questions. First off, why are men so stu- pid? Thisis not to say that thousands of years of male stupidity hasn't beenevident. But in this day and age, what possesses a man like former-Sen. Robert (smooch, grope) Packwood to religicusly tape record his daily legislative reflections, as well as, intimate details of his sexual conquests or escapades with staff members, employees and who knows what else? Assorted farm animals? The stupidity didn’t stop with the recordingof his mental regurgitation. He had an employee dutifully transcribe onto paper, some 6,000 pagesof lurid details of sexual encounters. The encounters were with willing and unwilling victims on office floors, elevators and car hoods. The descriptions would make Jacqueline Susann blush. Yet Packwood has given them to the Oregon Historical Trust. I suppose they could be a tourist attraction, Hesaid his “dear diary whodid I boink today” ritual was a form of therapy. He needs more than therapy. A canvascoatthatties in the back would be moresuitable. I don’t know if Packwood should receive the Mark Fuhrman Award or Fuhrman should receive the Packwood Award for taped stupidity. Which brings me to the Fuhrmantapes. We can bypass the racist and rogue copy labels and godirectly to the stupid label for him. Why wouldhe sit on the witness stand andtell Flea Bailey he never uttered a racial siur (the ‘“‘N’’ word) in the past 10 years when he’s been playing Dirty Harry on tape for Laura Hart McKennyfor the past 9 years for some alleged screenplay? None of this Fuhrman tape nonsense would have takenthe trial down this dirt road and away from the centralissue of Simpson’s guilt or innocence if Fuhrman would have answered truthfully. Because Fuhrman has nowinyoked the Fifth Amendment, therewill be no opportunityto explain Fuhrman’s first answer to Bailey's question. Conversely, O.J. is doing muchthe samething by refusing to take the stand.It would have been interesting to ask O.J. whether he used racial slurs while beating his wife Nicole. Wouldn’t you love to have a tape of the conversations going on in that white Ford Bronco during its infamous low-speed chase? Theironyof all this is if Fuhrmanis as racist as he appears and really tried to frame 0.J., he may be the cause of O.J. walking despite a mountain of evidence pointing toward a guilty verdict. Of course, this Forrest Gump mentality of “stupid is as stupid does” isn’t the sole domain of men. Onehasto ask, how did Charlie Sheen get his girlfriend to feel like she is his one and only after spending more than $50,000 on Heidi Fleiss hookers? I guess anybody can make a mistake. CIAO! Tom Barberi is host of KALLAM’s “Voice of Reason” show, 6 to 10 a.m. weekdays. responsefrom ELOUIS ELL! I Bull’s-eye, Tom! The big question is not, “Why did Packwood diddie?” but, “Why did he doodle?” His lechery, which was not an occasional iapse of taste and decency but a pattern of arrogant abuse over decades, is abominable and inexcusable. It’s also as familiar as the six other Deadly Sins. The stumper, as you say, was: Why would an inteiligent man someone to write an epic, sing a song,tell a story that would keep the name of Beowulf or Achilles alive when their bones were dust. Wewantthe world to know our names; we wantat least to make a visible mark. Otherwise, why do so many of Utah’s aspen trees bear names carved into theliving wood? Why do many sidewalks sport an initial or a handprint somewhere? Whydid a group of juveniles spray graffiti over more than 30 businesses in Salt Lake City last week? People leap at the chance to go on daytime television and spread their pathetic peculiarities before the world — the cross-dressing monks sworn to poverty who se- eretly bathe in champagne, the womanwhohasfallen in love with her husband’s ex-wife’s mother, et al. Such behavior confirms the sad range of human pecadillos. But whopublicizesit all? Tsit as simpleas the child’s cry, See me? See me? Aschildren, we scribble our names all over our notebooks, ink our names on our arms, chalk our romanceson sidewalks and on the walls of lavatories. As adults we can’t wait to tell our captive priests and bishops, beauticians and barbers all the detail of glorious us. But Bob Packwood was a U.S. senator, and accordingto all reports a particularly effective one. Wedid see him; by the millions we knewhis name. Yet an accountof his activities as a respected senator wasn’t enough. Somewhereit hadto be on the record, had to be a part of history, that he was also sexually itchy and given to indulgent, abusive scratching. The reason is beyond my comprehension. Expect his book any day: The Senator Was a Satyr. The royalties will eke out that meager $90,000 pension. And be sure to get his autograph. Elouise Bell writes for network magazine and is professor emeritus at Brigham Young University. For Some,It Is ParenthoodII @ Continued from C-1 Stokes of Salt Lake City. “But they need me, so it’s rewarding that way.” For many grandparents whoassume such an active role with their grandchildren, the financial burden can be heavy, particularly if the children need therapy for emotional scars left by parents who have abused, neglected or abandoned them, said Salt Lake social worker Anita Gander. Gander has been researching the prevalence and problems of grandparents who have taken pickup of andplastic for recycling, at no extra cost. But if residents do not request the recycling bins. their monthly garbage bill wiil be $2 more. The base rate for one can with three recycling bins will be $7. Withoutthe bins,the first can will cost $9 a month. “We know some peoplewill get those recycling bins and never use your insurance deducti uy to $100. Approved by Insurance companies. Fast, Free eSpoe from Ogdento Ae558 cate that between 5% and 7% of American children are being raised by grandparents without a parent presentin the home. After talking to 20 such families in the Salt Lake Valley (Ganderstili is looking for more), she’s heard the gamutof heartbreaking tales about children whose parents are unable or unfit to care for them becauseof drug-oraleohol-addictions, mentalillness, or because they have physically or sexually abused the children. But each time, Ganderalso has seen and heard about the resilience and determinationof grandparents whostruggle to give their grandchildren “normal” lives. Thatstruggle is complicated by the grandparents’ emotional ties to their own children. Especially difficult, Gander said, is admitting that yourchild hasfailed as a parent. And if grandparents and parents can’t agree on a mutually beneficial arrangement to protect the young children, Gander added, ‘‘there often are legal battles to be wonorlost in court.” One of Gander’s grandparent subjects, who asked not to be identified, has been called to court repeatedly during the last decade to reconsider her legal guardianship of her grandchild. “T thought it was over — atleast for a while. Apparently not,” she off beforea trip to California and asked that her in-laws enroll her in school. Connie, a long-time She has raised her grandchild teacher at the Parent Co-op Pre- from infancy, whenshe steppedin to prevent the state from intervening and placing the baby in foster care. The grandmother refused to say what circumstances threatened her grandchild’s safety at the time, or to say anything negative about her daughter other than, “a lot of young parents these days just don’t know how to raise kids.” Then she added, her voice cracking slightly, “It's hard to have a conflict with someone you love more than anything in the world.” That's why it helps to have other grandparents in similar situations to talk to — “another adult who understands what you’re go- ing through,” said the woman. Sheis trying to organize a support group, through Gander, for grandparents raising grandchildren. Just last month, Connie and Paul Manwill celebrated the seventh anniversary of their granddaughter coming to live with them. Rita cameto live with them as a5-year-old, just before she en- tered kindergarten. Rita’s mother had dropped her school, refused unless the mother promisedto keep Rita in the same schoolall year. Not long afterward, the Manwills sought and were granted legal custody. Since then, Connie’s been “Mom” to Rita and Paul is “Grandpa.” The Manwills’ son, who remains involved in Rita’s life, still is “Dad.” Sometimes it gets complicated,” Connie said. “What also is confusing to her is, are my children hersiblings, or are they her aunts and uncles? My daughters call her their little sister. My son thinks of himself as her uncle. We all just kind of go with the flow.” Connie admits that parenting a young child wasn’t what she expected to be doing at 56. “I expected to have little more freedom,but that’s OK. We don’t mind.” She and her husband are happy to adapt their plans for Rita or any of their other grandchildren. “We're basically into choice becausewelove being with the kids.” the landfili. 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BY DESIGN choice because we love being with the kids.’ parents. it Runs On Two Speeds But Your Gas Bill Stays On Low at's right..ora limited fg time GLASS ACT will to McDonalad’s a lot and to kids’ movies. We do it by either legally or through an informal agreementwith the children’s in Utah, U.S. Census figures indi- alt Lake Tribune “We're basically into family and love children, so we go over rearing their grandchildren, S. Jordan to Charge Extra for Not Recycling South Jordan residents soon will have to pay more for their garbage pickupif they don’t recycle. Feb. city will have the orien of curbside Rick Egan/Thi Paul and Connie Manwill help their 12-year-old granddaughter Rita, wholives with them,with her homework. >-0-270 * e eit Grandparents: aH TOM keep records of his miserable attempts to quiet the itch inside him? Anciently, two professions were honored aboveall others. One was the warrior, who fought for the protection and the glory of the clan. Butall warriors die, in battle or in bed, and whereis glory then? Glory could outlive the man,if there was someone to keep the record. Thus the second honored profession was poet or bard, c3 10, 1995 Seventh South 325-6292 West Va mene Kearns 967-6100 JordanValley 255-8644 Fort Union 566-0278 Sai 572-5401 MOUNTAIN AMERICA CRE DIT UNION 7 |
