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Show First friends ore best friends forever eolumnly Speaking By DON ETA QATHERUM the bus. They share candy, gum and riddles with you. You can write a fust friend a note, composed using a secret code that only you and your friend can understand. If you are lucky, your first friends will stick with you until you reach junior high. That's when you start noticing ' important things-the way others wear their hair, certain brands of clothing, popularity cliques, cli-ques, members of the opposite sex. Your first friends can sometimes be embarrassing to you. They can limit your chances of being "in" with those who are really " IN. " First friends disappear during your high school years. Somehow life is more than discovering common com-mon interests you share with your friends. High school students must climb, achieve, succeed. Friendship is more a method to get what you think vou want than a sincere desire to like and trust someone. Adult friendships too frequently are based on what the friend has to offer a better position at the work place, recognition in church or community, the opportunity to belong to a "Yuppie" group. Adult friendships change with circumstances. They are fleeting, insecure. First friendships are lasting. That is why when you meet a first friend for only a few minutes you remember re-member how happy you were when the friendship between two frightened 5-year-olds sitting in a kindergarten class who discover they both like cats, dolls, books, and Saturday morning cartoons was made. Without saying anything, you and your first friend know that your likes haven't changed. You both feel sad that you can't return to the clear, uncluttered time when friendships friend-ships were easily made and never forgotten. You know your first friendships will last forever. Last week I had a happy experience. experi-ence. I met one of my first friends. It was a brief encounter in a busy world. She said, "Hello." I responded with the same word. She said,"It's good to see you.' I agreed. M That's all there was to the experience. experi-ence. She was a first friend and every time you meet a first friend, you feel good inside. First friends are the ones that you find when you enter kindergarten. As a frightened 5-year-old, you sit next to another frightened 5-year-old. After glancing quickly at each other for a half hour or so, you finally final-ly cautiously start to talk. By recess you discover you both like cats, dolls, books and Saturday morning cartoons. You become first friends. You sit together in the lunch room. At recess, you share a ball or a jump rope. Gradually some other kindergarten children want to play with you, and you discover they all like cats, dolls, books and Saturday morning cartoons. Your circle of first friends expands to include nearly everyone in the class. If you disagree, by the next day the problem is forgotten. First friends forgive easily. They don't remember unintentional hurts. They don't gossip or hold grudges. First friends don't care how much money your dad earns or what model automobile your family drives. They don't notice holes in Levi's or a hand-me-down dress. First friends tolerate bad grammar and low grades in math. They like you for what you are and not for what everyone expects you to be. First friends invite you to birthday birth-day parties. They save you a seat on L |