Show TELL OF TRAITS OF SOME HUBBIES Bewildered Young Wives Have Confab I Two years sears ago she was a bride but now she has hns graduated Into the realm of the young oung marries and andI I learned about the strange belm for lor of husbands from her hor Although she Is still madly In love the passage of two years has revealed certain oddities oddities oddi oddi- ties In the man of her choice that she sho never tires of delineating In In fact she tells me nie that the only way she can convince herself that the youth Is not absolutely cuckoo In spots Is to hop In her flivver of ot an afternoon and snake mako the rounds of ot other her married contemporaries It Is then that she discovers th t her BillIs Bill BillIs BillIs Is not unique but most strangely like unto Tom Dick and Harr Harry At such times young wives wl air their grievances and the conversation con runs something like this The liThe first six months that wo we were married Bill hated to see company come He resented the calls of his friends as an nn Intrusion upon our happiness But now If f the doorbell doorbell doorbell door door- bell rings he almost knocks me mo down to see who It Is If It it Is a n visiting gent he falls on his neck with loud cries of Hello Tom old kid 1 I Have a n drink have a cigarette have anything I Howar war yu u an anyway anyway any any- way This little Incident has been repeated repeated repeated re re- re- re time after time In every home homo to the mystification my of bewildered young wives who cannot canno understand that however charming no woman can cnn be nl all things to her husband forever for for- ever When this Idiosyncrasy Is exhausted exhausted exhausted ex ex- ex- ex hausted of Its possibilities they move on to the exasperating retirement of the male behind the newspapers My liMy lear dear Its It's been months since I saw save Tom alone when he ho was not screened from view by the dally dallyn n newspaper The first thing In the morning he grabs the paper paper off off the porch Dorch and only emerges long enough to peck me over the edge of It when he lie goes to work In the evening the first word he sa says s 's Is Where Is the paper nd Ind that's the last of him till Ull bedtime Have you y-on ever in your life lite seen anything to equal the VU way they leave lea their clothes lying around the house Dick never hangs Bangs up anything Ho lIe drops his clothes off wherever he lie Is standing Actually Its It's uncanny the way they retain the shape of his body The legs of his trousers and the sleeves slee of his coat dont don't collapse collapse col col- lapse so that when I stumble over them Its It's like coming upon his dismembered dismember dismembered dis dis- member d parts 1 nothing to what Harry can do with the bathroom rug rug you Jou know that cute little square that I got for a wedding present Well so far as ns I can see he lie does docs nothing but stand on it Inthe in inthe n the most innocent manner as he h shaves sha but when he quits the bathroom bathroom bathroom bath bath- room the rug acts as If It had con con- Its It's a positive tumor in the floor flood 1 And then he bawls me out when I leave the lid off the tooth toothpaste toothpaste toothpaste paste Can Cun you Imagine the nerve nerves Bill thinks its it's simply terrible when I leave m my toilet articles lying around but you Jou should see his fishing fish fish- fishing ing tackle He said ald the Ue hardest thing about me mo to get used to was running Into spilled powder all nIl over oter the pla place e yet he has one special reel that has laid In full view on the secretary secretary secretary sec sec- for two years ears Our happiness would be ruined If I moved it 1 Isn't he crazy Toms pet names are are what get et me down Ho IIo called me grand things before we were married like darling and sweetheart and beautiful beau beautiful but now If he ho says hello old dear Im I'm lucky For th the most part parthe he lie calls me fat Now v I ask you what is your Jour opinion of a man who thinks that fat is a term of endearment endearment en en- dearment Besides Im I'm not fat or at le least st not very Just because Ive I've gained five pounds since wo were married he lie calls me mc fat at Its It's insulting in in- suiting 1 Their 1 sense of of ot humor Is the hardest hardest hard hard- est cst to put up with I say One awful aw awful aw- aw ful hot day we wo Were cre dressing to go out to dinner when Dick chirruped Honey Honc would you you like some Ice With that he gave ga mo me n a glass of water crammed to the top with the grandest ran est Icel ice 1 Honestly I nearly fell feU dead because he Just hates to get me a n drink I I thought My stars Is Dick going to be sick or something I took tool a sip of water and it was nasty and warm I shook it around to cool It of off and took another an nn other sip but It was still nasty and warm Dick was pulling on his sock with his eyes on the ceiling singing Do do deo leo In the nonchalant manner man man- manner ner nor the wn way he does when hes he's been up to something My dear do you know what that boy had done Hed He'd filled the glass with cellophane off the cigarette packages package so that it t look looked d exactly like Ice I was simply simp simp- ly furious and he was Just delight delight- ed cd That's a sample of ot what Dick thinks Js s funny I And so the young wives go on ad Infinitum when they discuss the strange behavior of husbands |