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Show NOTHING SERIOUS By Dan Valentino Dogs are like people about 99 out 100 are good. But you'll always find a bad one now and then. William F. Walker, superintendent of Sugar House post office sub station, ii an expert on bad dogs. One vicious canine, who lives with a doting master on the outskirts of the Sugar-House Sugar-House area, has a peculiar hobby: He likes j to bite strolling postmen. One look at a mailman's blue uniform, ; and the dog would go wild. j $yisd$ After several of his postmen had got nipped, Supt Walker got peeved. He warned the dog's owner several times that he would have to coop his mean-tempered pooch in the basement during mail delivery hours. s That did no good. The dog with the big teeth still roamed the neighborhood. Finally, Mr. Walker had to stop the mail delivery to the dog's master. Of course, the dog owner stormed into the office and started to scream. Mr. Walker was mad, too. He said such a mean dog should be shot. Then the dog owner blew his top. "I don't ask you (s shoot any of yeur mean mail carriers, do IT" he asked, and banged eut ef the office. A Joke With Ivery Purchase Bud Brain, Sugar House merchant, has stopped exchanging quips With hit customers. Bud has always been an advocate of friendly selling, which means that he liked to take an informal approach to his business, exchanging banter with his customers. He's all through with that now, though. The ether day s woman entered Bod's establishment and asked te look st some shirts. Bud showed her some shirts. "Will these shirts launder well?" the woman asked. "Lady," Bud answered, "these shirts will wear so well they'll laugh right out loud at the laundry.1' "In that case." the woman replied, "I doubt if I want them. The last two shirts I bought were these kind of laughing shirts and their sides split" Help-We Need Halpl Sam is having a hard time staying cynical these days. As you've probably noticed, we end each column with a cynical saying from a mythical character named Sam. But now we need help. Sam Is becoming absolutely toe on-cynical on-cynical if there Is such s word. So if you have some cynical saying that should be given to the world send it in, and we'll give credit in the column. Address allj cynical sayings to Nothing Serious, Salt Lake Telegram, Salt Lake City 10. Sam, the Sad Cynic, Says: It's almost time te stop lesving the garden hose out all night sad start forgetting to bring in the snow shovel. |