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Show Bare Knees Included! . It's Swell With Us If the Gals Bring Back 'Flapper Years' wss ashsmrd of it. I rode her sround in s chummy rosdater with the top down, but she didn't mind because she had littls more hair than I did to get mussed pi th wind. What I'm driving at ia that If the ladies want to be flappers ' again. I wish they'd go sll ths (way back to the '20a When they jdsncsd then, they toddled. This waa a step so simple thst even I could do It. When they listened to music they preferred " Dardanelles' Dar-danelles' or maybe "Japanese Sandman." Both very soothing to ma Took Whst They Got f When they wsnted a drink, they msde no whoopla about too much vsrmouth; thsy Just took whst ths msn brought em in a tsacup at the apsskeasy on De-ballvere De-ballvere blvd , In St. Louis. This thsy gulped with suppressed stranglea And when they wanted to discuss dis-cuss International affairs they quoted from the little Frenchman French-man about how every day in every way he was feeling better and better. A fellow could listen lis-ten to conversation liks thia or not, ss hs pleased. Or he Could' smoke little cigars, which ,csme In a tin box, 10 for a quarter. quar-ter. . Those were carefree daya and if the female sex can bring 'em back with flapper attire and everything II n eluding bare knsesl that goes with it. Ill not kick. I'll probsbly feel JO years younger, too. snd buy myself a 'coonskin coat. Copyright, lt. United Feature Syndicate By Frederick C Othmaa WASHINGTON The femsls sex is one of my favorites It has only One fsulL There's si-ways si-ways something wrong with its shape One way or another. In lta own opinion, I mean. The last couple of years ths ladies tried so hard to look liks women, only more so (I am reliably re-liably informed I, that some of their curves came from Akron, Ohio, carefully carved -of sponge rubber, colored flesh. Home of them even wore spring-wire contraptions con-traptions under stress, which wbea accidentally unholstersd, ' went zin-u-n-g. When that happened hap-pened a girl Jumped, as 1 stsbbed, which shs waa Thsse hsndsome parabolaa. whether artificially Inspired or naturally endowed, added to the Joy of living and the beauty of the landscape, and I had no complaints. com-plaints. Ladies nsver looked like this before, but I didn't protest. Not even once. Ne Mere Bipa Now the unpredictable sex Is tired of looking like women. It wants to look liks men. All over the place the ladies are chopping off their hair. They're wearing hats like upside-down pots. Their hips hsvs dissppesred, while the spongs - rubber facade business suddenly has gone tbs way of mah-jongg. If the ladies hsve waistlines they disguise 'em. Legs they're beginning to be proud of sgaia. Big business, which knows which sex butters its breed, is plsying along. Ths nsw shsps with ths curves flattsnsd out is svsjlsble in ahops across ths land. One of the biggest menu-factursrs menu-factursrs of men's neckties in America (a firm I doubt I ever shall pstronise again) la advertising adver-tising blatantly ths suggestion that ths ladies borrow their husband's cravats for uss ss scarves and othsr decorative affects. Pink Shirt Bis, The nation's oldest haberdasher, haber-dasher, in which females once weren't welcome sneept when buying Christmas presents for ths men in their lives, is doing a whopping mail-order business ia shirts for women. Mostly pink. This is all right with me. I never owned a pink shirt In my life If the ladies want toook like 'msn. I'm Inclined to humor 'em. so long as they swipe none of my ties. Their new straight-upend r down, or telephone - pole, look, brings back memories of my youth. Mostly hsppy. In 1927, when I wss courting my bride, a lady with a curve |
