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Show ip PET PEEVE )3f TV. Seott 2W l.''"' flgyiBi "PHESE spring hats the ladies are wearing are enough to give a fellow the jitters and bad dreams. I met one in the office-building office-building elevator the other day. I can't describe it exactly. It was a lot of straw, fish net, and gadgets. In the back there was a display of feathers somewhat similar sim-ilar to what a peacock's tail is supposed to look like. The elevator is almost full when this well-padded matron pushes herself in and jams me against the back of the craft. This peacock feather display spread itself just below my nose. For a guy who is allergic to feathers that was tempting tempt-ing fate. The sneeze, when I finally let it go, was a long, drawn-out one with enough wind to it to set a schooner on course at 10 knots. The hat tilted and set sail. It came to roost on the bald-headed man in front of the matron, with the tail effect tilted at a dangerous angle The matron screamed. The bald-headed bald-headed man slapped the hat and it fell to the fjoor of the elevator. "I'm very sorry," says I, and attempts to pick up the object of so much trouble. Did you ever try to pickNup a hat in a crowded elevator? It can't be done. The elevator girl became panic-stricken panic-stricken and punched the wrong button. We stopped with a jerk and the matron sat down on me. "My lovely $15 chapeau," wails the matron. I managed to get the elevator girl's attention. "Get this contraption con-traption started," I snarls. "Don't shout at me," she weeps. If I live to be a hundred I'll never forget the struggle that followed asr they hoisted the matron and her squashed spring hat out the emergency emer-gency exit. And I'm not likely to forget thaj 15 hat bill when it arrives. |