| Show I IYE l ON ETIQUETTE I Some Few Points Not Unusually Found in the Books THE EPITAPHS FOR THIS SEASON I Borrowing Tie Plates The Use of Hair Oil WIno at DinerPlaying tepfno i How to Register i 4 FOR THE SUNDAY HERALD By special arrangement wIth the authorl A resent vfork ca Low to conduct ones self in good society lias escaped from the pms within tho past month J and is temporarily engaged in lyiugj before mo Every little while sonjo self made man gets a new fountain pen and writes n Imtik on how to corrnscate in good form No one can light up tho gloom of social ignorance like the archi i 3 9 t i IIl l 1 1 c 1 ri I 1 I CiOD JADIG TTER l TIlE LINIIO OF OIi Ii liAr I t 4 Tie lias carved out his own fortune ur I fat Ca tao gloom and gravy thereof 11 along down the corridors of timo Give rao the coif poised and sef I appointed studentickot who has won his I tvy uuaid < J from the counting room of 1 1 1 I thO 1n stable and livery bbo to the proud dizzy I height of caller ciF atrcatehascatch cal md GnsooIloman hop for iucon mt con trrrertiblo and seeknofurther advice i jon j j-on how t behave He is the man who gcnornlly thinks that it good writer is a j j man who lies Avon his fame in that direction by his good penmanship Hose Ho-se ms to think that good writing implies J im-plies Q fovcrish and delirious display o ornamental and bad and oIucntl swans u11 bn spelling nnd I that powerful writing is produced by bearing on a littlo harder than is ones Wont In short ho is as a general thing andy and-y general concession tho 15 do Inso oft of-t o century ho disfigures the artificial veneered gentleman who living lectures lect-ures his betters and dying ho and his whiskpra together goes t his reward justra the cor of scorching woolen ail hot hair uya is wafted to us across tho biro cf thai country where roundtrip round-trip ticots aro unknown and perpetual accorded In Etonover privileges are II Hfj ho distracts attention from his own glaring shortages by lecturing others and in death ho wears a very tooth SQlt artificial smilo and n costumo which doss not cxtand below the plate glasa peep 1010 of his narrowhouse I his homo paper on the nest week appears ap-pears tho rolo bgCU CARD S I desire to tliajik the friends and neighbors I cost heartily i this manner fa their united aid and cooperation tlanns the illness reid death of any reecjt husband iio escaped from aioljy the band of death on Friday lost whila we were cat J i breakfast To tho friends both oas and all l who thus contributed r willingly tovard making I tho last moments and funeral of my husband r howling caecass 1 desir to bo remembered most 1 that thesis few lines find kindly hoping tl1t lSl lne may fnd them cnjoymjr the eiaio blessing I bow to the cruel stroke I s have n good mUch covr and roan gcldnp hcrso rising of eight years oU nhich I will soil chcapoa the premises God moves iu a snytsrious way his wonders to Jlr fOr He psats Ids footsteps in the cea and rides upon 1ic zorai Also n black and whir shoto very log Yours truly wit HAJTCMI ROSEOLA PEETT Much spaca is given in this book t tho question whether or not it is good form to leave the teaspoon in tho cup hilt encompassing its contents or when passing it bade to get it replenished I is the belief amon the old school Presbyterians I Pres-byterians and Vhigc I think that the spoon should remain in an upright position posi-tion i the cup whilst the modern or ItlcKpe dynasty holds that the spoon should bo laid in the saucer or concealed about tho person whilst sipping the coffee cof-fee To this tho Calvinistic gentlemen who still atlhcro to the fly front pants and infant damnation reply that according f accord-ing to good usage the laying down of the son implies dissatisfaction with the hand and a call for a now deal However How-ever this may be tho manual above referred re-ferred to doca not straighten the matter Tip at 1 but says that the author him cclf adheres to the custom of leaving the spoon in the cup This I think will have a great deal to do with brealang Tip the practice A gentleman inalang a formal call into in-to morning should retain his hat in his had Ho may safely leave his overcoat J or dog in tho hall but he must retain F his hat as it means that the call is a formal one and not with a view to matrimony mat-rimony The name of the maker on the inside of tho hat also furnishes good reading matter when one has said all one has to say and i just recovering from the debilitating effects of a great thought Families in deep mourning should use black firecrackers on the Fourth of July a far south a Bleecker street When calling on any one at an hotel send up your card and wait for a reply I tho servant returns with tho reply that the gentleman is not in do not lose ou temper or throw a rubber cuspi dore through the mirror or say bitter things but go on about your business if you have any and if not advertise and get some at once Senator Jones of Nevada who once in a great while goes over to San Francisco Fran-cisco tobuy his groceries for the year stops at the Palaca hotel while there and has i nleasinc device for obtaining rest and soothful calm unbroken by the uncalled for calls of people whojwisli t drop i and espectorata from his window win-dow Ho and is registers unI a room i assigned as-signed to him by tho handsome clerk at tho Palace This number is placed o > posito h naiao in tho book People come in tako a fresh toothpick steal a few math scratch the calf of ono limb with the shin of the other look along down tho page deliberately BO a 1 c4 t keep paying guests from registering I I and say Hello Jones is hero I Will t 1 send my card up t him and see how he I i behaving himself The card is takep 1 + l trp anfl shoved under the floor for bena I tor Jones i not in that room That room i kept to store cards f But lie i not in it Sometimes ho gets almost a room full of cards he says if ho stays j there He has better the long enough Io a beter room which ho occupies Sometimes n real friend or constituent calls and foolishly fool-ishly sends up his card to thislay figure room of Jones and afterward when the senator meets him it affords him a deal of to his absence great pleasure t regret hi ab sence at the time of tho call In attending 1 funeral and while Viewing the remains do not lay the back of your hand on tho taco of deceased de-ceased to satisfy yourself that lifo is C tinct unless he had called upon you during dur-ing life Do not call upon persons in reduced circumstances wearing t great display of wealth and ornamentation I Possibly on second thought it would be better not to call upon them at all They might shock you by openly indulging indulg-ing themselves in habit of industry Do not make a display of consulting your watch Especially if making 1 first call on ono of tho nobility do not ostentatiously open the rear of your watch t show tho name of the factory or tho glitter of the works and uo not while visiting among titled people and while tho family are at pr i3ers in the morning blown kernel of wheat out of your key and wind your watch with n deafening report There is nothing that ii empt a God fearing duke to comedown come-down from the front steps of the throne of grace and brain his visitor with a frozen cucumber quicker than this Let us at all times try to be respectful to others especially if theres niondy in it I you are a hostess and engaged in entertaining tho nobility of One Hun drod and Fiftyeighth street do not jump up hurriedly and run to the barn tho moment you hear a hen cackle It is rude to your visitor and i an implied insult to veracity cf the hen If you aro a guest at the house of n neighbor who borrowed some of your pie plates for tho occasion do not in alit a-lit o rage or despondency over your failure to converse fluently with tho pastor call attention to the fact that these are your pio plates It is about the deiTOppisu thing you could well do This seasons epitaphs will be briefer than usual and run more into plain or Gothic extended letter The hand with forefinger extended upward will not be used much this in several fused so luch thi summer a severl instances this style of stone has heretofore hereto-fore been upended or turned end for end rather by mischievous people thus conveying a different impression on tho public mind from the one intended as to tho general direction taken by deceased It is still do rigger to say 5 Sacred to the Memory of p L Mister PELEG SCHWARTZ j and not S Sacred to the Memory of 1 PELEG SCHWARTZ Esquire At least this is the custom west of 1 Avenue A and especially on Seventh t avenue I I in making your first call you do soon i so-on a bicycle do not bring the instrument into the hal with you or hold it in your lap whilst calling You might drop it I and break it D not caress ou watch chain or I charms whilst making party call You will bo apt to wear tho gold of ind expose ex-pose your poverty which is vulgar True I politeness consists in deftly concealing your poverty and natural born vulgarity so far a possible I Do not pick up the wine at table and carefully scrutinize the label as i you were a connessurr when you are really a common curr You may fool the company com-pany during two or three courses with the idea that you are used to wine at home but before tho pie i reached you will manage no doubt to advertise the fact that you are accustomed to thick milk that from a gourd and not much of thatDo Do not waste your hair oiLon the wallpaper wall-paper Hair oil costs money and we cannot lubricate the future with tho hair oil that is past c UA 1 II f pgt L 2 I 7 HAIR OIL COSTS MONET DQ not gawp and listen like a bump on a log while some one is playing at the piano People will think you camo from the country If you are a gentleman and should the small tag ot the base of your shirt bosom become uetached and protrude between the waistcoat and pantaloons do not lose heart or become needlessly profane but either excuse yourself and retire behind the piano or hold the largo family album in your lap and willIe ostensibly searching the very soul of some meaty and scared relatives PQr trait you can rearrange yourself meantime mean-time keeping up a perfect gob of persiflage persi-flage The term JIessrs is getting tQo common com-mon I think as a substitute fop gentlemen gentle-men It ought to so It doesnt mean anything anti ougnr to tnaear itseit to every ono by placing itself on file in eomo thrifty oblivion establishment Do trop is no name for it Do we say in making speech at dinner Mr President I Presi-dent mid Messrs I little thought etc Of couis30 not Do wo expect to see tho sign in tho ladies cabin SlQssys unaccompanied i unac-companied bylVIesdame1 if fotpd in this cabin will be shot I hope and trust notThero Thero are many other things regarding regard-ing social customs funeral etiquette etcT whish this book suggests and of which I hopo in the future to treat pro videdl am snatched away during the watermelon season 1YJu > Atnoslceas Btangara gfngbams selling at8M pcr21dn PEOEYEQUITADE CooP |
