| Show MR AND MRS BOWSER I The letter Tells How the Former Moved tiLe Hal Coal Stove Last fall 3Ir Bowser put a base burner I in the front hal to keep it at a comfortable comfort-able during tlie winter and I when the spring came nothing was said I about moving the stove It wa not in the way We had no place to move it to and when summer came without Mr Bowser having said anything about a removal I felt perfectly assured that ho would leave that stove alone Great was my consternation therefore when he suddenly observed the other evening as wo roasted on tho front steps Well well but how absent minded I have become Why didnt you cal my attention t the fact that that coal stove had not been moved out of the hal Because it is to be left there Not much People must have thought us n queer family to have it there as long as we have Mr Bowser that stove i not in the way and it is not an eyesore Besides wo have no place t store it It goes to the barn of course Mr Bowser you can no more move that stove than I can fly Cant I I can do it with one hand tied behind me and Til go fight at it test Mr Bowser remember that I pro Certainly You are the great American Amer-ican protester anyway I I killed a fly youd protest I went back t the steps knowing well what would happen but I felt that had dono my duty I heard him fussing around for awhile and then he muttered Shes purty hefty but shes got to come out o this Ten seconds later there was a wild whoop and when I got into the hall Mr Bowser stood on one foot and was shaking shak-ing the other in the air while the top of the stove lay on the floor He had pulled it off at the first grab I Thunderand blazes and Jewhit takerand Texas and Jemima I he was yelling a he waved his foot aloft Didnt I tell you I queried a I looked at him No Never You never said a word not a word Now will you let thatstove alone font No Til take it out i of I here i I die Mr Bowser this pig headed obstinacy of yours will surely lead1 to None of the Bowser family were ever yet downed by a coal stove and its too late to begin now begn Another man would have removed the legs first Ho didnt think of it but undertook un-dertook to the stove move as one moves a barrel standing on emi He had progressed pro-gressed about five feet when there was a sound > vhich frightened the whole neighborhood neigh-borhood ifu j My first impression wa that tho ginger gin-ger ale factory in the alley had exploded and driven our barn up against the kitchen My next was that O British I gunboat had slipped around from the Behring sea and dropped a 400pounc shell on the roof of our house to offset Mr Bowsers assertions that aserions wo were the greatest fighting nation on earth I knew what had happened So did the cook So did neighbors It was a minute before I could move and Iwas flying indoors when I heard Mr Bowser utter a strange sound something between be-tween the last roar of a dying lion and the plaintive moan of acow for her lost calf I couldnt see him at first It was all stove and the stove was on top of him Between my screams and the COOKS shouts we got a neighbor in and tho three of us lifted up the stove and dragged drag-ged Mr Bowser out I got the doctor up No bones were broken but Mr Bowser had collapsed like an empty barrel and every square inch of him was bruised and pounded It was long after midnight before ho said anything I was rubbing him with arnica with one hand and fanning him with the other when ho looked up and askedMrs Mrs Bowser is it fatal Oh no dear Any bones broken None Did the stove fall on me Yes dear Dont yes dear me Mrs Bowser for I wont stand it The scales have fallen from Y eyes at last and I know you for what you are A nice job wasnt it Calculated Id be driven through the floor didnt you Hoped to be a widow by this time oh Tomorrow Mrs Dowser Ill call up a lawyer and well see whats whatDotroit Free Press Pres |
