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Show I : JUST FOR FUN A Home Thrust. Many years ago, in. a New England Eng-land boarding school for boys, th6 principal was a learned clergyman clergy-man a preacher ot long sermonB and a strict grammarian. One night, after 10 o'clock tape, when all tie boya should havo been in bed, ho wa3 passing silently silent-ly through tho dormitory when he I heard sounds of revelry from a darkened room. Ho rapped on tho door. Silence within. Then: "Who's thero?" "It's roe tho principal. Open the door I" "Ha, ho, ha-a-al Your're a liar! If it waB tho doctor ho would say, "It is I.'" Seeing the force of this argument argu-ment the doctor pnaHed on. Philadelphia Phil-adelphia Saturday Evening Post Crumpled Them. "We observo that the man's flng-ers flng-ers are all twisted and bent into J the moat uncouth shapes. I "Poor follow!" -we say to our 1 friend. "Evidently ho is- a victim of rheumatism." "No." our friend explains. "Ho 1h deaf and dumb and has been try-I try-I ing to talk Scotch, dialect on his lingers." Life. I Spring Cleaning. fe "I got a little too gay yesterday ( and was boasting that I could boa't I my -weight in wildcats." H "What happened?" I "My wlfo rnade mo beat double I my. weight in. rugs." Kansas City Journal. - r- ' ! 1 Willing to Support Proxy. A freshman of the University of Pennsylvania was called upon to vote tor officers in a recent gathcilug. -N'ot being well acquainted ac-quainted with, tho nominees, "he ing out his ballot. One or the company left the room with tho explanation that he would 'vote by proxy "So will 1, said Albert, and, with his pencil poised above tho paper, leaned over to a companion compan-ion on his right and asked: "Say, what's Proxy's first name?" Philadelphia Times. Unkindly Expressed. "Miss has been appointed a junior assistant of the Public Library, the books In which aro to be insured lor 3,000." Worthlng-ton Worthlng-ton Morucury. It may bo necessary, but It looks a little pointed. Punch. His Limit. Joshua had made the sun stand still, "Fine; but wc bet you can't mnko "Willie Jones do it!" wo cried. Herewith he acknowledged his limitations. Harper's Bazar. Mined. Policeman (to clubman returning return-ing homo lato) "Here, you can't open the door with that; it's your cigar." Clubman "preat . Scottl Then I have smoked my latch keyl" Hire; , tf. ?$ ., - r |