Show pho PRO hid mid why is G like the su sun suu because I 1 it t is i t the centre of lim liu why Is t the he letter i like the end edid of spring Beca because iise it is nnie ahe beginning of june fa 7 she that tha t marries a mani because he Is a good match be surprised if he turns tu As out a lucifer 11 A yankee doctor has recently recently orten orlen got up a remedy for hard times it consists often hours har hard bard dabor labor well worked lar emend t Is the difference between a banham bantam cock and a dirty housemaid the one is a domestic fowl the other a a foul domestic excuse me madam but I 1 would like to ask as k you why you look at me so very savage 1 oh beg your pardon sir I 1 took you for my hu husband sand joe how many scruple sils ss there in a dont know zur 11 well remember theres eight be um ceyther always takes without no scruples 1 on dr valentine mott once said to a turbulent graduating class young gentlemen have two pockets made a large one to hold lie ite the insults and a small one for lees have you yon said your prayers john maam it aint aing my work bill says the prayer prayers and I 1 the amens we agree to do it because I 1 it comes shorter jenny zenny weli annie how did you get along with that stupid foo of a lover of yours did you succeed in getting rid of him annie oh yes ves s i I 1 got rid of him very easily I 1 married ke him I 1 m and have no lover now I 1 now papa tell me what is humbug itis replie japa tapa apa when wilen mamma pretends to be very veny fond 0 of me and puts no buttons on my shirt veryl I 1 till I 1 reminded of it a dozen times queer definition that still theres theries some tru thin in it when I X have a cold in my head said a aa gentleman in company 1 I aW am always remark a ably b I 1 dull and stupid 11 you are to be pitied then sir jr replied another for I 1 dont kemem ber her even ever v e r to have llave seen you without a cold in your head no one would take you for what you are said an old fashioned ge gentleman ent leman ieman a day ort ont oi two ago to a young would be dandy in brighton who had more hair than brains why asked ed joe immediately because they cantsee jour your ears A lady waihing walking N a few days since on one of the wharfs in new york ask asked ed a sailor whom she met why a ship was called she the son of neptune replied that it was because her TI rigging gin cost more mote than the hull dont attempt too much knives that contain ninety blades four corkscrews and a bootjack are very seldom seldom brought into action and for this reason in attempting too much they have become so clumsy and ponderous that men of small smail patience cant get the hang of them in the year 1784 the legislature of pennsylvania syl syi vanla vania to abolish the practice then prevailing in passed the following resolution after considerable sl sid g erable opposition that hereafter no member shall come into the chamber barefooted nor eat his bread and meese cheese on the steps of the capitol an inventive genius intends applying to patent a machine which he says when wound up and put in motion will chase a hog over a ten acre lot catch yoke and ring him or by a plight change of gearing it will chop him into sausages work his bristles into shoe brushes and manufacture his tail into a corkscrew i i i the chinese booksellers have an odd way of of s selling e 1 lang their volumes they are disposed of ol not according to their value at a fixed price but acco according din to weight if on weighing them they are 1 too 0 1 light lit the seller coolly tears some leaves from another book and throws them into the scale there are many books published in this country that are heavy enough to be sold by weight even some volumes of our light utera ture might come under this category A ason agon son of the emerald isik islo isle isie lately had bad occasion to visit the city in his ills vehicle having arrived at this point of destination he be alighted and pro preceded ceded to transact his business on returning to the place where he be had bad left his horse and wagon he was astonished that his horse hadrum had run away way sure an did cebre ho break lk therein the rein I 1 Inqui toa tod lie he of his informant thie thle ino lo 10 I 1 believes pelie belie yei vei not was the reply well thru how hov in the tha name of st patrick could he have got Joose for sure ant an I 1 tied the reins belits to the wagon I 1 at a school examination previous is to the holiday holidays 1 the master baster determined determan brevi to I 1 a ge e a finishing stroke to show off the proficiency of the scholars as well as to give the parents and vasi tors a touch of his quality as a superfine professor of penmanship shows the co copperplate tie tre per plate style propounding and expounding the quest questions fons lons to his dear scholars he concludes not nov very grammatically mati cally you will say with this grand question and key to the art of walting writing the three first requisites of penmanship A and auburn genius with a decided inclination to the tho vermilion burning to be distan gulshen as a shrieked out easiness legi I 1 ag an and I 1 chos that says nays the professor 1 I bill vickers old mr nir V ickers vickers who was present with a tear of pride at the achievements of his billy lilliy exclaimed well billy after that you must go to college and learn alge aige bragy 10 p v 11 A medical neighbor tells the following while oid e on a pic wic nic excursion with a party of j young keople je people ople opie discerning a crows nest on a rocky prec precipice c pice pico T they started in n great eat glee to see who wio would reach it first their e r haste being neater greater than prudence some lost their holds and daere were seen rolling roiling and tumbling down the hill side bonnets mashed smashed clothes torn postures ridiculous but no one hurt then commenced a scene of most violent and long con linued laug laughter and ln which being all an young p people well acquainted with each other and in the e woods they indulged to a perfect surfeit they roared out with merry peal on peal of spontaneous laughter they expressed it by hooting and hal hai halloing hallowing loing when ordinary laughter became insufficient to express the merriment they felt y at their own ridiculous situations and those 0 ol 01 their juames and ever afterwards the bare meria mena tion of nest scene occasioned renew e ed d and irrepressible laughter Year years after one ono ond of their number fell sick beca became me so low that chat she could not speak and was about breathing breath ln herlest her last our informant called to see her gave his n name a ane and tried tomake to make himself recognized recognised but failed till lie he mentioned the crows nest a at which abe she recognized him and began to laugh 3 and continued every little while renewing it from that time she began ix gan to mend ree recovered and still lives a memento of the heiah eune curf |