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Show L'v SUCCESSFUL Hy. PARENTHOOD I , '' ' ''A A-odot, Editor. Pcnwr, j, LET THEM GROW IP! There is one puzzle about a child's growing up which doesn't get talked about as much as some others because parents usually try to hide the bewilderment it often causes them. This comes when mother suddenly finds herself being be-ing compared unfavorably with an attractive new school teacher or the "simply wonderful" mother of one of her daughter's friends, while father takes a nose dive in popularity in favor of a scoutmaster scoutmas-ter or the school athletics coach. But there are several perfectly acceptable explanations for your seeming demotion in the child's affections. For one, you knew him when! His past represents what now seems to the child a humiliating humiliat-ing dependence. Added to that is the fatal inability of most parents to realize that the adolescent is no longer a child, except, of course, on those unhappy occasions occas-ions when he reverts to a child's need for sympathy and uncritical love. Then it is indeed best to ignore ig-nore the years between and give him what assurances of your love he seems to need. On the child's part this same over-familiarity with his parents is what prompts him to go outside the family for hero worship. As a matter of fact, if his affections didn't begin to shift there might be cause for worry. Because growing grow-ing up and learning to love some one beside yourself wt many people never accommi Although they may 2 11 have families their m"l a loving is still centered Cl h themselves. And so M, 1 y provided that, given a J, mosphere to grow in chiM il go through different i111 learning to love. 01 Their first, love-object u lh mother, with other member the family occupying secon places in their affections Af they've learned to divide Ti devotion between mother and and to include brothers and 7 ters and a favorite aunt or parent, they begin to ,e ' outside the family in 8earchu "pals." Now comes the gang ,! for boys, while girls g0 throa;: the school-age period when h pered secrets with their best y i friend" are of the utmost irX tance. Next they turn to a syimi thetic adult and this is when are apt to think wisdom m charm begin and end in a tavoreJ teacher. Given this freedom to idealize friends among grown-ups without feeling that their parents resent new allegiances is the Und 0i healthy backing which leads mcst young people right back to tte families for the most cherisfcf! ideal. |