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Show . A Line o' Type or Two "Fay ce que vouldras. M f BY B. L. T. In Arabia the spirit which actuates I '.'.:e L-:g;ie fur Maying Virtue Odious is . known ;ts "Akhwan." The Akhwun : i :''. hcrhuud is i.ot cmcerned only wn.h I a ; 'hul.c b-v.r.g!'Sf but proiiib.ts Finok-! Finok-! i:: a::d presc-.o -. d only or.e wifu. 1'rayer j iri u.:.''.wJ. but is ntt compulsory. These ; c.rc duil d:iys for calenders, porters, aid j lau U'j of Bagdad. j Striking clgarmakers from a Boston j facto:-;.' j araded the other day, and ex- prt:.-si'd th e-.r discontent in appropriate phrari-.s. Meanwhile the en.pioyt.rd closed tho factory and moved tha business to Newark, -V J. So it goes, as Lais remarked, re-marked, puwdering her nose. Hungarian Rhapsody. Xow that tho Bela's over. Now that tho Kun is done. Hast heard how his "Benine boys" Stuck up iur Bela Kun? They shook down Buda Pesth's elite, Tho stuck-up folks, and then With automatic pistols Stuck up the workingmen, PAN. Our acquaintance with Mr. Chesterton's Chester-ton's work has been confined to his heavy stuff, but recently we have been reading his fiction, and we found the old boy very enteriiiining. We particularly particu-larly fancied his "Flying Inn." Advanced Journalism. (From the New York Times.) In caso of death call us on the phone, wherover you may be, and our representative represen-tative will be with you, without the least possible delay. Here's a little jingle about a celebrated cele-brated American which was new to us: "Wholly unquotable. Always ungoatable, Secretly notable, Silence's spouse; Darkly inscrutable, Quite irrefutable, Nobly immutable - Edward M. House." Recent howls from the German blatts evidence that the best place to kick, Germany Ger-many its in the financial slats. A Christian Disposition. (From the Menard, Tex., Messenger.) To whom it may concern: The party who carried away a slop jar from my place will please call and get the lid, which will be found on the opposite side of the gate, for it is a shame to break the set. MRS. GLEN MURCHISON. Dean Gay leaves Harvard to become i president of the New York Evening Post corporation. Gay is to grave, as 'twere; , lively to severe, so to speak. The Ell Family. Rg-Addendum. Sir: Maugre the reluctance I feel at giving this family further publicity, I am constrained by thoroughly human motives to advise you that the following names appear in the genealogy referred to recently in this Colyum : Miss Homleigh S. Ell, who managed a beauty shop until she married a distant cousin, Luke Likel, after which the couple went to Helngon. Wiehgott EH, who married one of the Helsheelcopherdamhedof fs of Helsingfors, and now resides in Hellville, Madagascar, where he represents what Is left of the German interests in Africa. Col. Givvum Ell, late of the A. E. F.. and now connected with the department of justice at Washington. GAL VI N" O' CLAIRE. We have mislaid the bill of particulars which the chorus girls issued on the eve of their strike, but, as we recall, they demand a six-hour night. Correspondence From Overseas. O Sir: We have been made aware of a soldier yclept Cesar Innocent, a mess sergeant. The only thing a mess sergeant ser-geant can be innocent "ot is overfeeding his men. Then here is Ex. -Pvt. Dick Massa of New Jersey, honorably discharged. He fooled 'em all. No humorous Hun can chant the doleful ditty, "Massa's in the cold, cold ground." PVT. E. M. Shoes at six and seven dollars are reported re-ported a drug in the market, because only a few people want them. We mentioned men-tioned this to a lady, and she said scornfully, scorn-fully, "Well, they look it!" You Know What He Meant. Sir: While fording through the landscape land-scape with a neighbor and his wife we came to a narrow strip of road and met a farmer with a team of mules hitched to a hayrack. My neighbor prepared to back, but his wife said, "No, John; he should go back, ns you were here first." Hubby tried to convince her that it was easier to back a henry than to handle a team of mules, but she couldn't see it. "Never mind," called out the farmer. 'T'U back up, I've got one of those at home." NORTHWESTERN. "Report Fall of Archangel." Headline. Head-line. Cf. J. Milton. To an Unknown Sappho. "I never wrote a line of poetry." In lazy banter laughingly you said. Demurely drooping your enchanting head Divinely modeled in sweet symmetry. A ballad gurgled in your tranquil laugh, A rondeau rippled in your mocking lips; And as the drunken bee his honey sips, A sonnet in your eyes was mine to quaff. So by that beauty your rapt mirror knows, AYid all tho maiden wisdom of your heart. For all you weave not measures with vour hand, A lamp of poesie by your grace glows: To virgins wise shut not the doors of art, As you who read these rhymes will understand. un-derstand. RIQUARIUS. Edwin Bok in the Ladies Home Journal Jour-nal says, 'A true story of the dangers and pitfalls that comfort the girl when she comes to the great metropolis alone.' "Peru, 111., News-Herald. Why, Mr. Bok! All the Comforts of Home. (From the classified ads.) Engineer Experienced, for electric light p'ant; night shirt; eight hours; $28 per week. While the relief might be only temporary, tempo-rary, there is a hint In a sign in Lincoln, Neb.: "Butcher the Grocer." Sir, He Spilled a Crockful. Sir: Tostifving in U. S. vs. Ecclesiastical Ecclesi-astical Art Works, 139 Fed. Rop. 798, J. Q. A. Ward says: "Art is the work of a human being in plastic material or color, or something to render a sentiment, senti-ment, to imitate a form, or something of that kind, which does not grow on trees, which is not in nature." Sir, he certainlv said a mouthful. B. JONES. The Leaping Sex. . Sir: In order to allay the public apprehension, ap-prehension, as a former St. Louis chief of jiol.ee once happily phrased it, I rise to remark that my silence has been due to tho performance of my duty as inspector in-spector of lovers' leaps. While on my recent tour the fact struck me (I had ! a eh'ld in my arms at the time, so the j assault was particularly vicious) that I all tho fatal leaps have been made by ' lovelorn maidens. F'or the honor of our ! fox lot us catch a male despondent lover ! uud push him over a cliff t-'oniewh ere. i STONE PHIZ. j "Joseph Lloyd, painter, Chicago; Irene . ITeiiyt s, telephone operator, South j Ectid." Nuptial Item, j Are they happy? II . |
