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Show SPICE. ' He ulins to be an Intellectual actor ac-tor ' "Well, I should Judge a "thinking' part would Just suit lilm " Philadelphia Philadel-phia Hienlng Ilulletln "America Is a country of rich nu-thors, nu-thors, ' says a literary exchange To which the Hillvllle Hunncr replies Ves, we saw one going home with a whole ham tho other day"' Atlanta Constitution 'I have only tho most distant relatives rela-tives " Has the family run nut'' No they have become rich" Indianapolis Indi-anapolis News. L-ilei Itetut ns Upgardsnn ' W hat ate you looking so glum about7 Vou told ine the othei day you hud thrown ull yout tinea to llic winds" Atom ho I had Hut tho wlul changed and binught them batk" Chliago lilbuue ' Didn't you see tho ptescnt Dlmpleion gnve to his wife" ' No 1 dl In t hiivn tint, to before she hud exchanged It ' Detiolt 1'ice Ptcss. "And so this Is your gymnasium?' asks tlio guest Hill where uie your gymnustl, uppliuncesf "I don t need any," Is the leply 'I Dud that 1 get all the exticls, 1 need Just hotting Into and out of my athletic suits " Halllinoro Ameilenu "Whnt have you i vtr dono foi your country ' asked the Indignant citizen Never slartcsl to count up," un-swiiod un-swiiod the prm tk nl polltli Ian Ion busy finding nut what iny country tun do for me " Washington htur ' Olio him plenty of rope, ' quoted the stranger anil lie II hang himself " "Mohhn ho will ' retutntd Alkull Jake, but nut lure we don t take no chance!. If we give lilm the tope, you w well make n sure thing Job of tho bunging " Chliugo Hvenlng Posl Jay Otecn ew must admit Diet ua farmers air a generous set uv fellers, lorn Drown Of tsiuise you me, lou no sooner get In tho lty thai, you pru-ceed pru-ceed to give youibclvea away Chicago News ' Do you meun to say you would not trust anybody who Is not polite" "V,s' iinswetml Miss Cayenne "a person to be tiusted Is one who doh not loc his bead lu an emergency And politeness is merely presence of mind, ' Washington Htar Physlian (at hospltnl) How did you happen to fall from the top of the ladder? lad-der? Patient A pretty woman was pass-Ing pass-Ing and while trying to get a good look at her I slipped and fell Physlelnn Ah, tho same old story a woman at tho bottom of It Chicago News Tenderfoot I sec there's gieat Indignation Indig-nation over the killing of dinger Jim. Native lfiu bet Why, Had H. b'H bullet went through Jim and smashed a Jug n' whisky on Poison Petes bar Such dnln s won t bu toleiated -CM caeu News. |