OCR Text |
Show PEgSONAL GPBMvlliy relation ships FAMILY FEUDING By William A. Miller One time a man said to me, "My wife and I have been married 24 years and we have never quarrelled. " I didn't believe him. God created each of us as unique individuals. That very fact means we are not alike. Conflict Con-flict is inevitable. If it isn't, someone is swallowing an awful lot of differences. PS! Some people believe that the ideal marriagefamily is conflict-free. They even teach that, and make you feel guilty if you quarrel. Fight! But fight fair. Don't get into hitting, or name-calling, or "you-ing" ("You are a slob." "You make me sick."). When you quarrel, define and agree upon what you are quarreling quarrel-ing about. (One thing at a time, please.) Don't drag in past history. Stick to the facts. Try to adopt a problem-solving problem-solving attitude instead of an attitude of "I must win." Avoid sniping and taking pot shots. Try to help the other person save face. Revenge Re-venge may be sweet at the moment but in the long haul it has a bitter taste. Dr. Miller is a counselor associated with The American Ameri-can Lutheran Church. |