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Show I . Dorothy Dix Talks j1 PUT THE BLAME WKER EIT BELONGS j By DOROTHY DIX, the World's Highest "jd) I The greatest herons in this world are n"ot those who have tho courage Hffc to look unafraid into the bright face I of danger, or who march undauntly( 1 . rf, into the hell of battle. Those who do-j servo to have thoir chests covered with decorations of valor are the men and women who are bravo enough to look into their own souls and have the grit Jj ; and nerve to recognize their own - weaknesses and light with them. i It takes more courage than most of J1 us possess to do this. When we arc called upon to go over the top and wrestle hand to hand, with our pet sins, we-turn coward, and quit cold We , ' have not the backbone it requires to 5. stand up and meet the enemy square- ly ani' admit to ourselves that the I ' fault is ours. I , . It Is so much easier to cry "Kama-, ,- : ; , rad! Kamarad!" and throw up our hands than it is to say "Moa Culpa! " fife; j ' ! it is so much more soothing to our: vanity to say that wo were rapped, be-1 fj.'-, j i trayed, gassed, out-numbered than itj ''$v' :i lb to admit that we simply funked. ''' ! Yet, in this camouflaging of our I ! weaknesses, we lot down a poi petual I. barrage that we never break through to1. ! between ourselves and improvement. iMf' 1L is because we shut our eyes to the Ol'- real cause of our failures that we nev- i sr succeed. Heredity, adverse circum- ,:i stances, lack of opportunity, jealousy, these are all excuses with which we If dope our vanity into making us believe M-f ' that fate was against us, and that we I are not to be blamed for not having '"V I j made anything of our lives. '''flm We will not put the blame where it belongs on our own lack of energy, ' or our self Indulgence, or our flabbi- - -M ' ness o oV our selfIsnness or ni&h iMi- temper, or uncontrolled appetites; and -v j so we go on failing, and failing, and jl whining over our ill-luck, when we 9 might change the luck and turn defeat Ifl into victory if only we had tho nerve Is to just once blame the right party for I our misfortunes. H j Perhaps this is ' the difference be- rfj'fl j tween the wise man and the fool, be- .' 4si . tween the success and the failure. All i of us make mistakes, but the wise man admits his error to himself and, profiting profit-ing by it, goes on to success, while tho fool blames his failure on everyone in tho universe but himself, and goes on ! failing to the end. of the chapter. I Take the , drunkard, for instance. Did ycu ever know a sot who didn't ! weep into his glass, and tell you that i he is the poor unfortunate victim of ' heredity, and It. is in his blood to crave 1 alcohol" and that he cannot help him- j self? Or else he has been driven to drink by domestic unhappiness. He j has a shrew of a wife from whom ho took refuge In a saloon, or he has lost ! a dearly-beloved wife for whose death j he is consoling himself in liquor. I Always somebody else is to blame. Never he, himself, and his case is j hopeless for there can be no reforma- tion for a man who does not admit ; that his sin Is his own, and try to over- j come it. And there are ne'er-do-wells, who stick like cocklo burrs on the skirts of every family, and are just as irritating. irritat-ing. They are strong, able-bodied men They have plenty or intelligence. Theie is no reason on carih why they shouldn't support themselves and their; families iiitc:.d ,of tho balance of us having to do it. j 1 Wo are 'forever getting the no'er-do-l well a job. Lecause he always protests that ho is anxious lor something to) do. but before we can draw a long breath of relief, hais back in ouri hands again. TIa has lost his pusiticn. No fjult of his, evor. Ho found out; that the work injured his eyes or j bnck or olse the job was in an unhealthy un-healthy place.- Or (ho superintend-, ent singled "mm out Toi persecution. Or his conscience wouldn't allow him to do something ho was asked to do. Or his wife's mother fell sick and hej had to stop and nurse her. j He always has a perfectly good! cause for quitting work, and If you'; start him in a business of his own. it lends generally in disaster. ' It's too! rainy or too dry, or a hot summer or! a cold winter or the trusts crush him, or thore's a cyclone, or a blizzard, ori something that other people survlvo but that carries him under. But he is never to blame. Oh. dear, no! Sick-j ness, the jealousy of superiors the capitalistic cap-italistic class, tho elements did it. Every Ev-ery thing in nature is to blame but i himself. j Ugeilrb.oltecur-m.tcogohim- And ho is hopeless. He never faces! .the truth lhaht the reason he couldn't j 'get along with his superintendent wasi becauso he was lazy and slack. That the reason he is always tho one who I (is fired when a working force is cutl down is because he is nn indifferent! worker, the reason he can uever.'getl along in any business is because hej lacks prudence and foresight, pep and ginger, and all the other qualities that make a man pull off a good job in the face of obstacles. One out of every twelve marriages in this country ends iu the divorce courts Probably seventy-five per cent of the 'marriages bring misery and sorrow to the men and women who are tied together, to-gether, instead of the happiness they expected. Each blames the other, and as you cannot change other people, you can only change yourself, condi- tinnR f'n f rnm hid r n n-nKto fV goes by. But if husbands and wives had the courage to put tho blame where it belongs, be-longs, they might back tho dream of their youth a happy home. Many a man might seo that the reason rea-son his marriage is a failure is becauso he is cold nnd unloving to his wife, ho is cross and tyrannical and dlctutoral to his children, and he brings nothing homo with him but grouches and gloom. And mauy a women might face tho fact that it is her temper, her extravagance ex-travagance and her ceaseless nagging that has alienated her husband's affec-(ttion affec-(ttion and wrecked her marriage. Put tho blamo where it belongs. That way lies salvation. Dorothy Dix's articles appear regularly regu-larly in this paper every Mondav, Wednesday Wed-nesday and Friday. |
