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Show . , Santa CUus Is going: to bilnj? Chaun-ry Chaun-ry I)epew a Muf-hing bride. 1'roviding "hauncey Is a Rood hoy. Lord Kitchener's extermination of the Hods Is Renerally through the agency i of the concentration camps. I Saturday being 'bargain day," the ) Hungarians have iut down the juice of Miss Stnnr-'s ransom to J90.000. 1 The cruiser Albany is sal.l to be a . menace io health. Admiral Cervera 1 will UMlfy that the Hrooklyn was also i anti-health. ! i ' I ' A Loui.sville tKy.) man Is going to s eat a straw hat to pay an election bet. ; The chances aro it will take fire as soon j j . us it's down. 1 On account of the heavy rains hostil ities in Venezuela have been declared off lor three weeks. The management iosii..,! ruin .ho..bu I The new process for making gold is eid to be simply chemical combustion, i Usually tin? combust iun takes place f after a man gets the gold. Heaver. Hichfleld, ftantl and other Places in Utah will please wire their hpecials to the Salt Lake Herald. The earl hiinke .season is oxer and the star shower season is on. J AVe do not wish to seem boastful eon. cerning our November climate, but a I man with a straw bat on his head was : seen walking serenely on Salt Lake's ; streets on Thursday. ; over in the Oregon Short Line of- b-cs they are operating machines called irithmometers, which adds, subtract. , . multiply and divide figures. A machine bite that might prove useful in some newspaper ollices. particularly the subtract sub-tract end of it. ! The fog in Chicago early this week j oral Mii.Muiiig in liOiidnn and resulted in loss of life through collisions. They do different in Hutte. A KOod many people keep out of collisions by keep-i keep-i lug in saloons until the smoke lifts and sometimes after. - The rest of the Hritish cabinet lay the responsibility f..r the fall in Eng"- 'i-h consols to an indiscreet speech of Sir Michael llicks-Heech. The real man to charge up with this disturbance in the English linances is General Louis j Botha. Although the terms of the Hays-Pauncefote Hays-Pauncefote treaty cannot be published until they are first submitted to the senate for confirmation or rejection, it is understood that the big end of the bargain was conceded to Uncle Sam Hiid nobody elsa will put a finger in the isthmian canal pie. The Irish parliament b-aders called on President Uoosevclt the other day and were cordially received, "While the ladies of the parly were paying their . i expects to Mrs. Hoosevelt. Teddy took I . HtMlmond tu one side from the others ai"! both nun conversed privately. London is amazed; really and positive- I - ly, shocked. I Among the Denver ministers who I f made Alormonism the topic of last I Sunday's sermons, we failed to find the I name of the erstwhile "Henry Ward I ! Heechei- of I'tah," that Methodist politl- j j ,al Sampson who slaved the Mormons I j witn the jaw bone of an ass every time j f be appeared on the platform. Let's see his name was Ivy-leaf, or something that sounds like the Ibex mine In southern south-ern Utah. The presence of a dude hunter in lUe Adirondack or in the mountains of Maine Is a sure sign that something will be hit instead of deer. Up to the present, twelve persons have been shot by accident and live killed as a result of bad shooting. And the regret is that none of the twelve were dudes. Tomorrow will be a great day in ''hicago. A mass meeting to welcome the delegates of the Irish parliamentary parliamen-tary pary will be held Ht the Audito-ium. Audito-ium. That the sentiment will be as much American as Irish needs no bet-I bet-I ter proof so long as the first speaker; I is Senator Mason, who afterwards in- ' I troduces John Redmond. j Next Thursday Is Thanksgiving. He thankful if you have something to share with somebody who has nothing. He thankful If you have nothing, because be-cause no one can cheat you. If you are In robust health, be thankful. If sick, be thankful that you are not worse. Ho thankful that you are alive; you might be worse off if you. were dead. In any and all events, be thankful. It's a dull day that doesn't bring a Miss Stone story. She is dead; she isn't. She enjoys good health; she Is utterly prostrated. The bandits will kill her If the ransom is not paid soon; they ui uo nounng oc me num. me ransom ran-som has been jnereased; It has been decreased. With such world-wide notoriety, no-toriety, who would, not be a bandit's captive rather than a second-hand parson? |