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Show ALAS! POOR YORIOK. A great controversy is raging in England Eng-land over "tho Piltdown skull," which appears to havo belonged to an ancient gontloman of simian tondencies. Somo of tho Boipntists dcclaro that tho brain caso shows that U10 ownor of tho skull was a man whereas tho jaw indicates that ho wa3 a monkey. This differs from -somo of onr modern skulls, in which both tho brain cavity and tho jaw show that the man is a monkey. T)r. A. Smith-Woodward reconstructed tho skull from tho discovered fragments and arrived at ono sot of conclusions. Professor Keith built up tho skull in another way nnd reached different conclusions. con-clusions. The workman who found tho Fkull drovo his pick through its roof nnd knocked out somo of tho teeth. Thin blow almost killod tho savants, but they revived sufficiently to reel off many miles of theory. Somo of them aro convinced that tho antiquo gentleman of Piltdown is a brother to the man-liko apes and kin to tho apelike ape-like mon, and they havo designated him as the "dawn man." Tt will be soeu that this hns no Tcferoncc to tho man who roturns homo at tho twilight line in a condition that makes him "half-brothor "half-brothor to tho apo," and has his cranium cra-nium reconstructed with a rolling pin by tho household scientist. Wo find on reading farther that tho "dawn man" does not resemblo the "Noandorthaloid paleolithic man." Wo admit that wo trembled lest this great crime should bo fixod upon Mr. Piltdown. Wo arc glad thnt ho has proved an alibi and we can only hope that it is not a framo-up. The condition of Lopez has changed slightly for tho worse. Pretty soon General Villa will bo asking, ask-ing, "Who is Carranza?" Mrs. Pankhurst has returned to her English residence in Ualloway jail. Tho French exports threaten not to recognize Mona Lisa whon thoy meet her. Pancho Villa appears to havo at-tendod at-tendod church for tho first timo in years. Dr. "Branncr of Stanford university wants Frisco to admit that it has tho quakes and tako its medicine. Sonalor Boot seems to think the currency cur-rency bill is none other than our old friend "Bill" Bryan. The Democrats, arc at thoir old trade of providing their Uncle Samuel with a deficit. Senator Thomns wants tho nations to fix the parity between gold and silver without waiting for the aid or consent of Bryan. Tho biggost divorce factory in tho country has been established at Boise. Its output will exceed that of Reno, it is taid. Tho report that Admiral Fletcher stopped tho fight at Tampico appears to have been erroneous. We fear that the admiral has not much training as a peacemaker. Speaker Clark has called an "economy "econ-omy couforenco" of Democratic chairmen chair-men of appropriation committees. We hopo it will not prove to bo a "hard times party." A gTeat wavo rolled in upon Santa Barbara and now tho inhabitants report re-port a mastodon's skeloton and an ancient an-cient ship cast up by tho waves. They vould better rub tho salt out of their eyes or they will seo tho sea serpent next and perhaps other reptiles. |
