Show WIT AND HUMOR Chicago Record Have you any stylish neighbors Stylish Mrs Toozle next door is just getting over a IBO attack of typhoid fever Detroit Free Press Commercial Terms What Is investment grandpa f Ii Well It is giving a man a 15 dinner and then selling him ga 2000 bill of goods i Harlem Life Both PleasedBrowne Allow me to have the pleasure of returnIng return-Ing that J3 that I borrowed the other day Smythe Thanks the pleasure Is mine Cleveland Plain Dealer How beautiful Is the snow he said So white so pure so universal It falls alike on rich and poor It turns the beggars hovel to a I dream of glistening beauty It But just then a snowball caught him under the ear and a half ton of the same material fel from a cornice and lodged between his collar and his neck And he spoke no more Detroit Free Press Boys said the school teacher who can tell me George Washingtons motto Several hands went up Philip Perkasie you may till When In doubt tell the truth Chicago News The Evidence at Hand Giles It is said that the scanty garments gar-ments worn by the barbarous races account ac-count for the unusual longevity among them Smllss dont doubt It Just look at the great age attained by our ballet girls Harpers Drawer A Conscientious Woman Norah had been told to say at tho front door that her mlstrsss was not at home when certain callers appeared upon the scene It evidently went much against the grain for her to make herself her-self responsible for even so small a white lie but she promised to do so and with certain modifications she kept her word Is Mrs Blank at home queries the caller For this wan tolme Mrs Smithers she aint said the maid but hlvin hell her If yez ashk me again Ill not lol two Ice for annybody Hvln1 upon me cowl I North American The friends of the condemned secured a writ of suspension at the last moment and the western I sheriff was hurriedly telegraphed Sus lend Tho next day thud prisoners counsel arrived ar-rived Where is the prisoner he asked Over at the undertakers replied the sheriff I suspended him according to orders Indianapolis Journal The difference between character and reputation repeated re-peated the student who hd been half asleep all through the study hour Er why a ssrvant has to have one and a prize fighter has tt have t ea other |