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Show I .it it . 1 1Or0 . I Io Iril o 0 0cLbott . ril : Or0 ( : zImJ zImJzbout zbout abatIt cLbott zboutSalad cLbottSalad ( : Salad \ Mixers l\IIxers l IIxers de Luxe . . L BANSING LANSING ANSING , , MICHAbout MICR-About MICR About MICRAboutonce MICH -About About - Aboutonce once in so often you meet meetthe meetthe meetthe the man-lt's man lt's lts man-it's it's its man - it's its ' ' always a manwllo man- man man"ho man manho - \\ho ho "ho wllo " " \ \ . knows J.nows Jnows how to make maJ.e maJe . the theperfect theperfect perfect salad dressing , andon and on onthe onthe the slightest sltghtest provocation does doesso docsso so The trouble with wlth this party partyis partyis is when you get him offsalad off salad saladdressings saladdressings dressings he's hes ' practically a total totalloss totalloss totallossNevertheless loss lossNevertheless Nevertheless , a decent sahd sand sahddressmgand sanddressingand saliddressing dressmg-and dressmg and dressing-and dressing - and a decent deccnt salad-arc salad arc salad-are are saladarcboons saladareboons salad - areboons boons to humanIty humanItyThe humanityThe humanityThe The right commmglmg commtnglmg commm- commm commtn- commtn commmbitterish - ; glmg of astrmgent astringent , , bItt bitterish e r 1 s h greenthings greenthings green things pthings with asmooth asmooth a | smooth bland dressingthere dressIngthere dress | ing-there ing there Ing - there you havesomethIng have ; _ , something ,5ten But often of often \ten ten \ ,5 5 , ten we are confronted confronted confront . y ed by a monstrosItyfeaturmg monstrosityfeaturing monstrosity < Jfeaturing featurmg featuring whIppedcream whippedcream whipped s ' - ? WyA- WyA WyAif - if Aj Ajf'vf f'vf fvf f'vfsweet ' cream , nut kernels , f , r rsweet sweet cheese , preserved pre | yserved ' served frw fruit 1 . , even evenmarshmallows evenmarshmallows evenmarshmallows marshmallows o 0 r Irvin IrVlD S Cobb CobbpIckled Cobbpickled Cobbpickled pIckled ginger gmger . Such an atrocity is 1S never a salad saladPut saladPut saladPut Put a crust on it : and md it might pass passfor passfor passfor for pic pie , but would be very low low- lowgrade low-grade low grade - . grade pie . . . Concerning Concernmg \ Mr 1\Ir 1 Ir . Earl Eul : Browder . HAVING H TJAVING AVING been discouraged by a aperhaps aperhaps ai perhaps overzealous polIce polIceforce policeforce policeforce force from frm ( ) speaking in m IndIana IndianaEarl , , Earl Browder . , , one of o1 the almost almostcountless almostcountless almostcountless countless candidates tor for PresIdent Presidentnow , , now threatens suits for false arrest . . . A As " . Al Smith says , , let's lets ' ' look at atthe atthe atthe the facts \ Mr 1\1r 1 1r Browder stands for forcommunIsmstands forcommunismstands forcommunism communIsm-stands communIsm stands - stands for all commu commu- commuulsm communism communism - - nism ulsm stands for Therefore he must mustlook mustlook mustlook look on the Russian government as asthe asthe asthe the one ideal government . , It bemg being bemgthe beingthe beingthe the very flower and perfection of ofapplIed ofapplied ofappbed applIed communism eommumsm eommumsmNow communismNow communismNow Now , . m in Russia any man publIcly publIclyadvocatmg publiclyadvocating publiclyadvocating advocatmg advocating doing domg away with the ex- ex exIstmg existmg ex existing - isting Istmg national system and substitut substItut- substItutmg substituting substituting - - ing mg some other system therefor thereforwould thereforwould thereforwould would find himself m in Ja Jaor ] jail ail-or ail or -or or - or even evenIn evenin evenin In a worse fix-before fix before fix - before he could say sayJach.ovltz sayJackovitz sayJackovitz Jach.ovltz Jachovltz Jackovitz . RobertsonofTski RobertsonoffskI Robertsonoflski RobertsonofTskiSo RobertsonoffskISo RobertsonoflskiSo So what I say is that \ Mr 1\lr 1 lr Browder Browdershouldn't Browdershouldn't Browdershouldn't Browdershouldnt shouldn't shouldnt ' crave to sue anybody If Ifhe Ifhe Ifhe he believes in m the practice of what whathe whathe whathe he preaches , which , of course , he hedoes hedoes hedoes does , he ought to go aiound around kISSIng kISSIngeerybody kissingeverybody kissingeverybody e\erybody e erybody everybody \ on both cheeksCruelty cheeks checks . . . Cruelty to Ammals Animals Animals.T AnimalsT . LATELY ATELY a dog was tried before beforeL beforea a judge tor for biting a boy And Andanother Andanother Andanother another judge was appealed to , that thathe thathe thathe he save an elephant condemned to todIe todie todie dIe So some one proves that thatthrough , through many centuries , . anImals anImalswere animalswere animalswere were accused of high crImes-dogs crImes dogs crimes - - dogsrats , . rats , pigs , oxen , roosters rosters ( ) , storks storksalso , also ants , spiders , snakes , grass grass- grasshoppers grasshoppers grasshoppers - hoppers , dolphins , . locusts , . gadfues gadflies gadflieseels , . eels , and , being bemg convicted , were wereburned wereburned burned , flayed , hanged , destroyed destroyedby destroyedby by slow torture . But think thmk of the charges on whIch whIchthe whichthe whichthe the so called brutes might condemn condemnmankIndoffenses condemnmankindoffenses condemnmankind mankInd-offenses mankInd offenses - - oflenses of which they theyrarely theyrarely theyrarely rarely or never have been gullty- gullty guilty- guilty gulltymalIce guiltymalice guilty-malice guilty malice - malIce , , slaughter of weaker thmgs things thmgsfor thingsfor thingsfor for love . of .of slaughter , , delIberate delIberatewastefulness deliberatewastefulness deliberatewastefulness wastefulness of natural resources ; ; wanton destruction of natural beau beauties . ties ; ; wars without rational cause ; unnecessary greed ; ; bearing bearmg false falsewItness falsewitness falsewitness wItness , , neglect of our own y.oung young youngdrunkenness . , , drunkenness ; ; slothfulncss slothfulness , bigotry , intolerance . . . Newspapers Vs . Spellbinders Spellbmders . DN IN N MY reportonal reportorIal youth nearly nearlyevery nearlyevery nearlyevery every newspaper , . big ( ) or r little littlewas , was bitterly partisan . We dIstorted dIstortedfacts distortedfacts distortedfacts facts and editorialized in news stor- stor stories stor stories - . ies when dealing dealmg with the accursed accursedopposItIOn accursedopposition accursedopposition opposItIOn Otherwise . we'd wed v.e'd v.ed ved ' have havebeen havebeen havebeen been traitors trmtors to a sacred causeThese causeThese cause causeThese These times the average paper paperbig , . bIg or little , prints prmts honest accounts accountsconcernIng accountsconcerning accountsconcerning concernIng both bOUl sIdes-theIr sIdes theIr sides - their rela rcla relative . tive chances as revealed by polls pollstheir , . theIr waning or gaining gamIng hopes . Thepolitical The ThepolItical Thepolitical polItical views of a columnist or 8 a 8specIal aspecial aspecial specIal contributor may d duTer differ I'er Ier ' from fromthe fromthe fromthe the publisher's publishers ' polIcy-stIll polIcy stIll policy - still he gIVcs gives gIVcsthem givesthem givesthem them space . But the spellbinders go right on onspoutmg onspouting onspouting spoutmg spouting fiction which everybody everybodyknows everybodyknows everybodyknows knows is fiction luld knd nd the volun volun- volunteer volunteer volunteer - - teer debaters clamor with prejudiceand preJudIce preJudIceand prejudiceand and misinformation tor for their thclr am- am ammumtIon ammunition am ammunition - munition mumtIon munitionBy mumtIonBy By the way , will all those who whoever whoever whoever ever heard . of .of anybody being bemg con con- converted converted converted - verted by . one .one of these Ulese barber shop shoparguments shoparguments shoparguments arguments kindly raise their thclr rIght rIghthands righthands righthands hands ? e . S . S . SCurrency Currency JOggIlDg Juggling Jneelmc"DEING JneelmcDEING ' . BEING " EING ! frightfully rightfully smart to begIn begInI begInWIth beginwith begin1J with , I know as much regardmg regarding regardmgcurrency regardingcurrency regardingcurrency I currency juggling jugglmg as the next fellowwhich fellowwhich fellow fellowwhich -which which - which is precisely nothing at alL alLUp all alLUp . Up to . , , say . , , $18 18 $ 75 , , most . of .of us know knowwhat knowwhat knowwhat what money is-or is or is - or used to be . . But Butwhen Butwhen Butwhen when they talk in terms of billionsor btllonsor billions btllons or trillions or jlllions j1llions jilhIons , , they've theyve ' ' got gotus gotus gotus us going gomg down for the third time timeW1th timewith timewith W1th with a low gurgling cry . . And the more a financial techni techni- technicum technician technician - - cian cum , with both his pants pockets pocketsfull pocketsfull pocketsfull full of figures , tries to explain explam these thesegovernmental thesegovernmental thesegovernmental governmental manipulations , th themore the ; more convinced convmced I am that , . like hke the theaverage theaverage theaverage average specialist . , , he has concen concen- concentratcd concentrated concentrated - - trated tratcd on an being expertly ignorant ignorantupon Ignorantupon ignorantupon upon one involved subject rather ratherthan ratherthan ratherthan than remaining , as most of at o1 us do dobroadly , . broadly and comprehensively ignorant ignor ignor- ignorant ignorant - ant upon practically all subjects . IRVIN 8 S . COBn COBB COBB.Copyrlcit COBBCopyrlcit . Cop'l'lc'1t Copllc1t Cop'l'lc'1tWNU Copyrlg'it-WNU Copyrlg'it Copyrlgit WNU ) ' ' * -WNU WNU - WNU STvIco Servlco Service |