Show A I e WII m COFFEE i + There is one thing in this country which I cannot understand said Jimmy Dickson president of the Eagleeye Gun club yesterday and that Is how people in Utah can fish with such remarkable alacrity Explain yourself said Editor Willis Wil-lis of the board of labor arbitration agitation and conciliation Well replied Dickson its like this The fishing reason opened yesterday I began at midnight on the morning of yesterday Black bass came in season sea-son at that moment Now Keene had I black bass on his breakfast bill of fare at 630 that morning and what puzzles me Is how a man could get up early enough fish fast enough and travel fast enough to get those bass all the way from Utah lake to this city in time to scale and dress them for a 630 breakfast I < > 0 Julius Gauer has In stock four bushels I bush-els of firstclass gooseberries which any housewife desiring to1 enter the I canning business can get at cost or Inftb f less it happened this way Julius was the victim of a practical joke on I the part of two officers from the post who by the way deserve to be cour martialed and shot Julius served in the FrancoPrussian war with distinction distinc-tion earning a meal fr assisting to repulse the French cavalry at Sedan and when the two subalterns from Fort Douglas came down horseback riding he gave them a few lessons in I horsemanship which made them jeal i ous and inspired them with a desire to get even in some manner I So one of them told Julius he was quartermaster at the post and as such I it was his duty to make all the purchases pur-chases of supplies He related that in 11 I the regular rations issued to the soldiers sol-diers was s much fresh fruit In sean and that the regimental surgeon had I advised the use of gooseberries He i dIS his comrade were going to go to J i the Hot Springs and spend the night I bathing and would Gauer kindly holdup hold-up all the early farmers and buy all I the gooseberries lie could get and hold j i them until they sent down the wagon Julius said he would and for two hours I after daybreak hailed farmers and i bought green gooseberries He bought at fancy prices too knowing the guy ernmewt would stand it and then j J waited for that wagon Finally when J patience had ceased to be a virtue he i telephoned to the pst to know when I I in hades they were going to send after the fruit The spectacled sable soldier I at the phone connected him with the I post adjutant and hat worthy did not know a thing about it the sergeant I major was at a loss and tie post far f ncr couldnt explain It finally dawned upon Gauer that he had been sold and I now he has soopeberries to throw at the birds I Joe Young isaman with large intelligence in-telligence This means Joeof the Oregon gun Short Line Of course I will he remembered that at Garfield the freshwater fresh-water supply is short that is to say there are no artesian wells springs and that sort of thing which pour aqua pura day and night with no rest They haul water there for people to t drink and up to date the cups have been the size of steins and a person I would usually fill same drink half and throw the balance away which was I a waste of good stuff Joe pondered on I how to do away with this custom ali last winter and solved th < problem j this spring just before the frost went i out of the ground He has had holes j bored in all the cups at n point where j one drinks I the drinker fills it i any j fuller I runs out on his orher clothes chases itself down the front of his or her shirt or shirt waist as the case may be and promises to be n hawUng I success a n water saver Up to date the device hasnt been patented butte but-te road seriously thinks of cither protecting it with official letters or i 1 raising the superintendents salary I < 9 < Jimmy Dickson Billy Young and Emanuel Manca constitute the duck hunting committee o f the Eagleeye Gun club and haveearned a reputation wherever they have gone for paying the highest market price for whatever they obtained Had the rested on their honors all would have been well but they determined to wrest the honors hon-ors of the fishing end from Midshipman Midship-man Henrr W Beech Kantncr and General Bloor who are the Isaalc Wai tons of the aggregation Yesterday morning they arose early The last belated newspaper man had not finished his frugal meal of grilled of bore V i Mancas cafe whentz40 h I hied forth after fish Manta wore the I sporting suit he had made to order in I San Francisco and Dickson and Young 1 wore smiles They came back late in 1 the afternoon No fish i Asked to explain Dickson replied I that the people in the locality where they went were all Jews and that I i would be much cheaper to buy fish i right here in the city and take them i along with them than to go out on any t more expeditions for trout We will do it too before we s 1 arid what we I have endured since w > rome back Of i i course all of us brtl rtd fish f n we came ml toil the witter1 V Wfc yarted I some of thofce fresh pnes we caught I and the beggar didnt do a thing but fail to tumble and speak right out so all could heat that he hadnt anything left except some catfish and salmon jalmon V canned at that in the fish line and i when We winked at hIm he safd Oh i I thats all right you think Im lying I but Mr Manca didnt buy enough fish by half to meet the orders V Oh we are good things I don I think I am i going to drop Emanuel He is a hoodoo j hoo-doo We went with him after mushrooms I mush-rooms a few mornings ago and got I back Thats all we did get Said he i knew where there were millions of them He didnot h4 > > i A prominent Republican said yesterday yester-day that the latest advices from Washington Wash-ington are to the effect that Arthur L Thomas is attempting to belittle the standing of exSenalor Brown with his party in this state and is asserting that he I Thomas is the man upon whom the i straightout Republicans of Utah depend I de-pend for advice and counsel and to whom they look when they want a leader The record in the case said I I the gentleman seems to warrant Mr Thomas in saying this For instance I in-stance Tlicenas was appointed governor of Utah by Harrison through the efforts ef-forts of the Tribune He endeared himself I him-self in the hearts af the people so much that when he ran for chairman of the state committee Charlie Crane beat him as easy as rolling off a log The division on party lines came right away afterward I after-ward and Thomas ran for the nomina I dio tion for governor He was nominated I nit Then he announced himself as a I candidate for the United States senate Brown got the votes of all the members mem-bers of the legislature I who were Republicans i Re-publicans save one TYiomas got lets I see what did Thomas set Oh yes What the small boy shot at Next he i j came up for honors as a delegate to the convention at St Louis and although i the silver element was making a fight on Brown Brown was sent and Thomas sat down to listen to the news from the meeting Then Thomas entered the po lltlcal arena in earnest He rustled I around and whooped himself up as a candidate for the chairmanship of the I Pleasant convention Blown didnt say a word and was elected by acclamation accla-mation while Thomas didnt get voes enough to darken the tally sheet Thomas then madean effort to be elected chairman of the doublebarreled convention at Ogden where Holbrook Harmony and HI I was the watchword watch-word Brown went up on 3 late train and as soon as he entered the hall was made chairman by acclamation again I aan whHe Thomas canvassed around to get > a proxy so he could sit Brown worked through the campaign and Thomas thought he did Tnats the difference Brown stood by his colors and did some hustling Thomas said he was a Republican lust as though that cut Any figure Thomas was interrupted In all his speeches Brown was listened to patiently Drown was consulted by all the leadinr men of the Republican party Thomas chased after Doolv and j I Campbell telling them what the j I ought to do Brown fought a hard I fight Thomas vwlshed the Tribune i would get back into line Now that it I is all over and MCKinley is elected I j Thomas goes to Washington and plays a confidence game I there is any credit to bo I credi givenBrown is the man and not Thomas |