Salt Lake Herald | 1895-03-08 | Page 4 | With the Wits

V WITH TilE WITS The intelligent young lady looked over her glasses at the average young man and asked suddenly How old would you take me to be V I wonder said ho to himself whether wheth-er she wants to be rated five years younger on the score of her looks or five years older on account of her brains Darn these advanced women anyhow Cincinnati Tribune A woman may put on the trouser And shun each kitchen utensil But its doubtful If you can arouse her And teach her to sharpen a pencil Cincinnati Enquirer V Nell Are you going to the opera tonight to-night Uell No whats the use I have such J x frightful cold I can scarcely speaK above a whisper Philadelphia Record Mabel Do you believe that May mar riages are less happy than those of any other month V Mrs Lalffshore I wasnt any hap pier when 1 was married In October Jan uary April August February or June Chicago Inter Ocean GiverNow I hope you wont spend this dime for whisky Lane Walker Good kind sir I want you to realize your hope mid Ill tell vnj how you can do it come Into the cnnn and set era up and Ill ave the dime for a bed Philadelphia Inquirer Any news in town John Yes the hangln postponed What for V V Well the man frcrc an while they wuz atrvin to thaw him out he got burnt upAtlnnto Constitution Hello colonel Havent seen you since he war Where hid we meet then sir Well if It wuzut under the house It was up a chimney 1 Atlanta Const tu lon