Show DM GOOD SHOR1TIEOFHESH Goodwins 1 Amateur Tickettaker The Verdict I I was In the false and hateful tfcws of Pittsburg They had opened a new i door on Nat Goodwin and he wa at a loss for someone he could trust to goon go-on saId portal and collect tickets in his name But Goodwin in a pinch is fertile and S not to be treed The celebrated E g Gibbo Murphy was in town inciting the natives to give themselves un to the drinking of Mumms h tla Dry Good I win has just left the worthy K G Mat I M-at the Anderson hotel at which hos tflry he was working his Mumm decoys for all they were worth Goodwin had only a moment He rushed to the hotel ana seized G 1 by the lapel Give uo Mumm fcr a moment pleaded Goodwin and hearken unto me Theyve sprung a new door on me old man and wont you come over end jou collect pasteboards once for me Its a tentoone shot itll save me from l throwdown for a cool hundred No body knows you here come on old man and do me this favor Any man who Is aware in evep half fashion of Edgar Gibbs Murphy full well knows that he would ratner do a I favor than do a faro bank He loved Goclvdn sympathized with him in his peril He would go on the door at once S onceCertainly Certainly Ill go said Edgar Glbbs Murphy reassuringly and Ill let you i in on it in advance Nat that Im unto un-to every trick Im a fairly soon man Nat you dont know I now but you will know I Ill give you a pointer I learned to play the guitar in two le sons 1 this Edgar Gibbs Murphy poured forth as Goodwin was hurrying him to rest the scene of action Goodwin tells the restId Id just got made up said Goodwin and was talking to the stage manager when loud and angry voices and some very strong talk began to manifest themselves in the body of the theatre The row grew it began to sound like the first symptoms or a riot I peeked through the curtain At least forty angry cursing gentlemen were scattered scat-tered about among the seats all in a state of heat and high confusion Such epigrams as these were flying Thats mv seat Youre a liar thats my seat Ill be dd hinged I its either ot yours its my seat You call me a la and Ill swing on your neck ac You will nit You try to run your bluff on me and Ill sink in your teeth tccthi was frightful continued Good win and a situation bordering on blood Something must be done For the life of me I couldnt guess at the origin of the tumult but rushing forth makeup and all I soon learned the truth What do you think The unqualified un-qualified Murphy with that rare sagacity sa-gacity for which he has note had given the audience the general admission end of the tickets and stuffed the seat numbers In his pocket When we got out to the door where he was thus founding murder and mistake as fast I as he could he was just passing in two beautiful young ladies whb hadnt any I tickets at all j Pass right in ladies he was saying say-ing gallantly You dont need any money to see a show of mine Your presence is an honor pass right in and take any vacant seat I Of course we tore the volatile Edgar I Gibbs up by the root sand gave him a layoff I took half a hour to straighten I straight-en out the house and the curtain was Just twenty minutes late in ringing uo I However we got out alive and without casualty but never more I said to Murphy never more be officer of I mine MAude and Sympathetic Agent New York Sun During the long run of the Little Minister in this city last winter Miss Maude Adams frequently spent Sundays Sun-days at her summer cottage in a little New Jersey town which at that time of the year was almost deserted The train service had been cut down and niost of the passenger trains puffed right past the station unless they were signaled that passengers were waiting to board them A young man familiarly familiar-ly known as Joe acted as station agent last winter and he was very proud of thel occasional privilege of flagging a train for Miss Adams One day white she was waiting for a train which was late Joe felt it incumbent upon him to be entertaining and he began by saying Are you still playing in the Little Minister Miss Adams Yes Joe still playing Dont you get awfully tired going through the same thing every night Well it is sometimes very hard work acknowledged the actress Joe looked thoughtful for a moment a if casting about for some suggestion of relief and then his face brightened and he said Say Miss Adams why dont you get another job Miss Adams was saved explanations by the opportune arrive of her train A Story of Lincoln Cincinnati Enquirer At recent dinner in Boston a former I for-mer citizen of Springfield Ill told the I I following Lincoln tory The fire hose company of Springfield was very proud of Its wellequipped fire apparatus and I desiring to procure some extra supplies I I subscription papers were rent around I The small boys myself among the number num-ber were given a share in the work I went up to some dusty rooms over a grocery and entered the law office of Lincoln He asked me numberless questions and I had to tell him all I r knwjRtf this fire brfssA13 l f jnem ber4hen he said irWJ IH tell you what 1 do Ill go b ta Cupper I MrsVIilncoln is generaWr soodnatured after supper and then 1 tell her Ive I been thinking of givi T 50 t tho bet I gade nd shell say Abe will you neveraave any sense Tet doIlar is qUit enough So tomorrow my boy you come around < and get your 20 I oJ i An Expensive Instrument f < ChIcago Inter Ocean Stuart Robson made an unfortunate tficatrieal venture several years ag but it did not affect his good humor Meeting party of congenial contemporaries contempo-raries at the Lambs club one day he said Say boys I want you l to come down to my place at the Highlands High-lands and have a look at my 50000 organ or-gan Your what chorused the Lambsj My 50000 A handorgan rejoined re-joined Hobson I keep it down therein there-in the barn Oh come now I say spbfce up one of the party its too jolly jol-ly hot to joke Now be honest thats a wheze Isnt it No pon honor ansiid Rpbson Ive got i all right Dontyou rem mber that tour of The Cadi Of course you do Well I aspired pined to be a real manager and to use a viUTiacular to the east side I got theresS Yes sir I r t there with bth I feetVe used this handorgan in one act awl I is all that is left of what I lost c the venture which separated me from500io of Uncle Sams one dollar obligations There are others Mr Cheney paid 41000 fora pair of suspenders sus-penders as a memento for backing the tour f Georgie Cayvan |