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Show Balancing motherhood and a career topic of talk at Am. Fork Hospital not okay either." 4. ASSERTIVE. The assertive person acknowledges his feelings and needs without blaming others for them. He stands up for his rights, but is sensitive to the feelings of those around him. His philosophy is "I'm okay, and you're okay too." Walton stressed the importance of honestly and assertively acknowledging needs and feelings without blaming others for them. "As working mothers we are sometimes frustrated or exhausted," she explained. "It's okay to have these feelings and to express them without feeling ' guilty." ; Walton encouraged all women to do something nice for themselves every day. She gave a list of 38 relaxation techniques, which included in-cluded ideas such as "enjoy hot tubs, hot showers, whirlpools and saunas where available," and "buy yourself a gift for no specific reason." For a free copy of this list, send a self addressed, stamped envelope to American Fork Hospital Public Relations. 170 N. 1100 East. American Fork, Utah 84003. When a woman combines a career with a family, she often finds herself under incredible stress. Often the demands of work, home and family can be overwhelming. Many working mothers feel guilty because they cannot perform perfectly in all facets of their life. Balancing motherhood and career was the topic of a talk given recently at American Fork Hospital by Elaine Walton, social worker. According to Walton, mothers who work do so for many different reasons. For many, working is a financial necessity. When a mother works she often finds herself under extraordinary pressure to . ac-' complish all the things she feels she must do, often at the expense of her own needs. Walton stressed the importance of taking some personal time each day. She said that when mother is happy, her family and others around her will be happier too. "We can't do everything perfectly all the time," she said. "We need to learn to compromise our expectations and ; make sure that we are taking care of our own needs too." She also emphasized the necessity i of releasing unnecessary guilt. "Guilt is learned," she explained" "First we have so much responsibility respon-sibility and then we feel guilty about it. We need to learn to let go of guilt." In addition, Walton stressed the importance of living in the present. She said for working mothers to take life one day at a time, or even one hour at a time - just dealing with the batch of problems and challenges right now, instead of worrying about all the ones off in the future. One helpful skill to master, according ac-cording to Walton, is assertiveness. Encouraging every working mother to take a course in assertiveness training, Walton described the four types of interpersonal communications com-munications responses: 1. PASSIVE. The passive person is afraid of drawing attention to himself, and doesn't want to make waves, so he won't usually stand up for his own needs and feelings. He thinks, "i'm not okay, but you are okay." 2. AGGRESSIVE: The aggressive person stands up for his wants, but he does so at the expense of others. He is always blaming others for whatever goes wrong, picking fights and making a scene. His thought is "I'm okay, but you're not okay." 3. PASSIVEAGGRESSIVE. This type of person doesn't like to make waves and won't stand up for himself in front of others, but then he takes out his frustrations on those around him, usually his spouse and children. He has a "kick the cat" mentality, with an outlook that says, "I'm not okay, and you're |
