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Show THE EARTH AS A RESORT The earth is a ball, flattened a little, like an orange that has been sat on at a picnic. It is situated in the northwestern northwest-ern corner of a region called space, where it gets the full benefit of the sun on bright days and of the moon on romantic roman-tic nights if the dust clouds are not too thick and it doesn't rain. It is larger than a baseball, but less important. It is not so large as a fixed star but is much closer and it boasts a much pleasanter climate. It is not as large as most movie stars think they are. The earth is a ball but not the kind where people dance and get drunk. It has two poles of which they are certain because exployers have been there and sat on them. It is supposed to have a center but we have to take this on faith as nobody has been there. We live vin the crust of the earth which is thinner than an eggshell in proportion pro-portion to contents. Some day, if the government keeps on looking into things, we shall know positively what the contents con-tents of the earth are and whether it is a good egg or is rotten. The earth has an equator and an axis or axle which are purely imaginary and a big depression which was said to be imaginary but which has proved to be real. The earth is inhabited by human beings, husbands, crooners and other insects, in-sects, aniraalculae, bacteria, vitamins, tax eaters and bill collectors. col-lectors. It is connected with the rest of space by sound waves, light wiaves, ether waves, radio waves and permanent waves, as well as by .telescopes, horoscopes and prayers. First comes the atmosphere, then the stratosphere and beyond be-yond that there are other fears. Autos fill the land and airplanes air-planes the sky. The earth is highly recommended as both a summer and a winter resort for well-to-do persons. Favorable Favor-able terms given to large parties during the dull season. The Pathfinder. r . . |