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Show VERY SOUL OF WIT FAMOU8 RETORTS CHARACTERIZED CHARACTER-IZED BY BREVITY. Stories of Noted Mm WM Were Quick la 8tlMxUjian Ojifortu-' nlty ta'Make a Joke. Brevity has been the marked characteristic char-acteristic of many happy retorts. What could be more crushlatY mr grimly witty, than the reply attributed to Tal-lyrand Tal-lyrand on an occasion whea certain notorious' personage, ill aad In great pain, said that he was suffering the torments of the list Swiftly came the wicked retort: "Deja" already? Of a different complexion, but equally equal-ly exemplifying the soul of wit, was the reply, which has been attributed to various painters, to a questioner who wished to know the vehicle with which tho painter mixed his colors. Dr. John Drown tells tho story of Oplo. "'Pray, Mr. Ople, may I ask what you .mix your colors wltbT said a brisk dilettante student to the great painter. 'With trains, sir,' was the gruff reply nnd tho right one." Single word replies, more or less witty, says tho London Qlobe, are fairly fair-ly common. A patient whom tho famous fa-mous Dr. Abcrvethy had advised to tako a walk on an empty stomach calmly replfcd: "Whose?" A recent example was the answer ol the lato Dean Hole to a boring Cockney Cock-ney fellow traveling on the Great Northern railway. "What comes after 'Itchln?' " asked the bore. "Scratchln," came the swift retort, and thereafter tho conversation flagged. Many brief and telling replies are laid to the account of Douglas Jer-rold. Jer-rold. It will suffice to recall one "What's golug on?" said a bore, stojJ ping Jerrold In the street. "I am," and the speaker suited the action to the word. Akin to this was the answer of John Wesley to the blustering swaggerer swag-gerer who pushed against blm on the path, with the Insulting remark: "I never make way for a fool." "I always al-ways do," said Wesley, quietly stepping step-ping aside, and then placidly pursuing his way. Brief and witty was the reply of a Catholic cleilc to an opponent In argument ar-gument who had declared his disbelief disbe-lief In purgatory. "You might go far ther and fare worse," was the ecclesiastic's eccles-iastic's parting shot The wit of more than one of Dr. Johnson's crushing retorts was enhanced en-hanced by brevity, but examples are to familiar to bo quoted. Johnson came down like a sledge hammer on Scotland and things Scottish. Less familiar, fa-miliar, perhaps, Is the retort In which n Scotchman scored. An Englishman in Scotland was abusing the country, complaining of the state of the larder lard-er and wondering where he could get less to eat. "I could tell ye a place whaur yo wad get less," said the Scot, who was listening to the tirade. "Whcro's that?" asked the other. "Oh, JuBt whaur an Englishman's been!" said the Scotsman dryly. Brevity as the soul of wit Is exemplified exem-plified In many popular salngs. Wit Is by no means nn Inevitable Ingredient Ingre-dient In proverbs. Many of them nro of doubtful sense, nnd some are foolish, fool-ish, yet thero Is a certain spice. The definition of proverbs by Howell as "Sayings which combine sense, shortness short-ness and salt," Is In the main true. Though truth may bo nltogother absent ab-sent and wit -barely perceptible, yet there must bo a certain "salt" which gives life and savor to tho saying. It would be difficult to find say-Ings say-Ings more telling than some of the shortest such, for Instance, as "Forewarned, "Fore-warned, forearmed," "Extremes meet," or tho ancient "Inter malloum et In-' etidem" (Between the hammer and the anvil). Many sayings which In Eng-llsli Eng-llsli nro short were briefer still In their original classical form. That the soul of wit was exemplified exempli-fied most strikingly among the Greeks Is only what wo should expect. It is curious to remomber that our word "laconic" preserves tho memory of tho reputation for conciseness of speech borno by the people of one part of Greece tho Laconlans or Spartans. When Philip of Mncedon threatened them, "If I enter Laconla I will level your city to tho dust," they made the famous reply: "If." |