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Show Kathl een Norris Says: The Roving Husband Bell Syndlcate.-WNU Features. "What you have to do, Khoda, is to gel if through your head once and jot oil that yot. hold all the cards. Don't throw down your hand; cull his bluff.' By KATHLEEN NORRIS EXACTLY how much hard, conscious effort are you making to keep your home atmosphere normal nor-mal in this dreadful time? Exactly Ex-actly how clearly do you realize real-ize that extraordinary goodness good-ness and strength and unselfishness unself-ishness are being demanded of every one of us; that we are being given a test beyond anything any-thing our forbears ever knew? We have to keep ourselves sane In a world gone insane, and preserve pre-serve for those about us, and for the boys when they come home, something of the goodness and heroism hero-ism and wisdom that has made America what she is. Anyone who doesn't recognize the situation, and doesn't, rise to it is failing America Just as much as If he were a sentry asleep at his post. But unfortunately there are a good many men and women who are drifting along in the old lazy way, making their concessions to the times only in complaints and protests pro-tests against war Inconveniences. Here is the case of a husband end wife whose lives seem untouched un-touched by the world conflagration, but who are obviously suffering from the nervous strain that is over us all. Rhoda is 37. She has been married mar-ried 11 years, and has three daughters, daugh-ters, 10, D and 3 years of age. The middle child is a polio case and will never be well. Rhoda's husband hus-band is a dentist 40 years old, and formerly a devoted husband and father, especially close to Tanya, the handicapped child. A Pretty Norse. But in the last year. Rhoda writes me, Lew has changed. He has grown Irritable and silent at home, he Is often away. The cause Is a pretty grass widow of 28, who is a nurse in his office. There seems to be no question that Lew is Infatuated, In-fatuated, and while he doesn't talk of divorce, Rhoda believes that that is what he would ask if he dared. "But he'd better not get that far." says Rhoda's letter. "It would ruin his practice In this town, where my father and mother are much beloved, be-loved, and he could hardly establish estab-lish himself anywhere else, for he Is almost entirely deaf. "I do all the work of my house, with the older girl's help. I bathe, feed, amuse my darling little Invalid, and manage that my baby has plenty of fresh air. Washing, cooking, dusting, planning are all up to me; certainly I show the fatigue and weariness that I feel at night; I am human, I get tired, discouraged. Impatient, nervous I know It. But most of the time I am the mother the girls adore, and the cook and housekeeper that other women copy and consult. "Mrs. Norris, Lew spends most of his money on this woman. He takes her home two miles out of his way, every night, and often takes her out to dinner. They have been seen dancing. They have spent nights together at the Mountain Inn His present to her this year was a squirrel coat; I have never had a fur coat He sent me soap and per-fume, per-fume, and the girls toy and dresses; she picked them out, I j ft i 1 0 botb4 in your children, , , , i A CHANCE TO LET DOWN i The emotional stress of war effects everyone. Many find new strength, unsuspected courage when crisis come. Others discover that the social upset gives them a chance to ' do what they've always secretly secret-ly longed do, but refrained from because of public disapproval. disap-proval. The 40-year-old dentist discussed dis-cussed in this issue is a case in point. He has developed a passion pas-sion for his office nurse, a pretty pret-ty divorcee of 26. She it going along with him, taking his presents and entertainment. His wife, Rhoda, writes that she is "desperate." She has thought of suicide. His coldness cold-ness and cruelty are "driving her crazy." suppose. He was away then, foi four days, and I think she was witr him, though his story to me was thai she was sick, at her married sis ter's house. "He seems a different person; h hardly seems sane. We have alwayi loved each other; I feel as If 1 couldn't stand his complacency, hit silences, his coldness and cruelty any longer. But what life do I make for myself, tired, feeling 2( years older than I am, with three children to raise on alimony T I've thought of suicide, I've thought ol everything. I'm desperate. Tell me what to do." e I What you have to do, Rhoda, it . to get it through your head ones and for all that you hold all the cards. Don't throw down your hand; call his bluff. Take the attitude thai Dolly is being something of a fool a generous fool, of course, bul nevertheless a fool, to take up with a married man, partially deaf, wit three children. Wake her up In the night every week, asking if Lew li there; some patient wants him. Make yourself over with a new frock and a changed hair-do. Appear Happy. Be happily busy and absorbed with your girls, almost rueful wher Lew decides to come home for dinner. din-ner. A pretty happy wife, In pretty lounging pajamas, laughing over a supper of milk-toast and cookies, with her children around her, Is a mighty attractive thing on a cold night. Resolutely refuse a divorce. Following these tactics you'll find yourself happy again, and happiness Is the one thing that draws a man back. As he tires of Dolly's charms they always do yours will begin to gain on him. Then treat the whole thing as a sickness a we.ikr.rss, which it Is, and ro Into a new relationship re-lationship of confidence and affection affec-tion with a changed man. To men these adventures on the side are nut nearly as Important as to their wives; he can hnve no respect for the complaisant Dolly, and what he does feel for her is not a lasting thing, as everyone knows. Concede him this period of Irresponsibility Ir-responsibility In a crazy world, and don't let It seriously Jeopardize your lasting happiness and security. |