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Show Kathleen Norris Says: Don't Take Yourself Too Seriously Bell Syndicate WNU Feature. "rcnonnl appeals, tears, hurt feelings, references to your excellencies as wifeall these don't count. Hut an attitude of unselfish, cheerful usvlulness, o interest in things that you like, of independent amusements and occupations, have won many a wandering spouse back to the domestic path." By KATHLEEN NORRIS DON'T take yourself too seriously. It's a very common fault. It wrecks many lives. It's another an-other name for all the detestable detest-able things that come under the heading of pride; arrogance, arro-gance, sensitiveness, suspicion, suspi-cion, jealousy yes, everyone of them springs from taking oneself too seriously. I know women and you do, too, who won't let any trifle pass if it reflects re-flects upon their pride. Sally Brown is one. She will waste half of a beautiful morning in telephone conversation something like this: "Mary? This is Sally. Darling, I know you're busy. But I had to call you because of that ridiculous thing Eleanor quoted me as saying yesterday. I thought you'd instantly instant-ly think I meant your Joan when I said it was ridiculous for girls to wear the bathing suits they do-when do-when all I meant was girls in generalyou gen-eralyou know how I adore Joanie Mary ought to hang up Instantly, for Sally will keep this up for 20 minutes, but Mary is too polite, and so valuable time in her morning, as well as Sally's, are wasted. The 'Know-It-All.' Then there's Emily, who thinks she knows the pronunciation of every ev-ery word In our language and several sev-eral other languages, and bores her friends to extinction by interrupting conversations with: "Molly, I want you to tell Jack Kent that I was absolutely right about the pronunciation of 'sacrilegious' 'sacri-legious' the other night. Remember how mad he got? Well, I looked it l.n " Again, there's Olive Cutter who Is always afraid you'll think that the Cutters who run the general store are relations. She tells you over and over just where they came from and where her ancestors came from two entirely different parts of America. It is Olive too, who hasn't spoken to her husband's joyous big hospitable family for years because of something one of them said. It seems that the Cutters Cut-ters and the Hardistys Olive was a Hardisty never forget and never forgive. But worst of all, and most expensive ex-pensive of all to family peace, are the women who take wifehood too seriously. Hundreds of them destroy their own lives, and the lives of all those connected with them, by a deep-rooted feeling that everything every-thing that concerns Herbert is theirs, not to be Joked about, not to be touched by any other woman. Suth a wife resents the simplest compliment Herbert may pay Mrs. Watson, In the office. If he says Mrs. Watson is an accurate stcnog. rnpher, his wife counters with a hurt "She doesn't wear her clothes with any style at nil!" If he reports at dinner time that he has asked Millor and his wife to dinner, Pauline says quickly, "I like that, asking guests without any reference to poor little me, who will have to get up the dinner!" Later she may be lovely about It, but Her- 1 9 An attitude of cheerful usefulness. , , ," OVERLOOK TRIFLES All of us like to think that we are important, that we matter. mat-ter. ' In a sense this is true, of course, but there is such a thing as taking ourselves so serious- ly that tve become a bore and a pest. We can endanger our happiness by this one fault. Many marriapes are ruined by self-importance, undue sensitivity, sensi-tivity, pride and arrogance. A lot of thinps really don't matter much. We must remember re-member to pay attention only to the big things, the truly important im-portant things, not to annoying annoy-ing trifles. Too many women are so concerned with fancied slights or veiled insults that they waste time and nervous energy trying to get revenge, or to prove that they were right, or to explain to everybody every-body just how they happened to be in the unfavorable position posi-tion that they seemed to be in. There are a lot of matters to forget as quickly as possible. Few people worry about you, or care much what somebody said about you. Just go along as if nothing had happened. People will quickly forget. There are serious matters of course, that are very difficult to overlook. Sometimes we shouldn't. But in most cases the difficulties will right themselves, them-selves, if we try not to be too worried about them. bert won't forget his first unpleasant reaction to her vanity. Personal Reaction. "Mrs. Miller had a pretty dresf on," Herbert may be fool enough to say later. "My dear, if I spen: the money she does on clothes, 1 could wear gowns like that," Pauline Paul-ine instantly returns. Put yourself through a little cross-examination. Ask yourself if your first remark, no matter whai I subject is mentioned, is about I yourself. Of course we all have to talk about ourselves a lot, it wouldn't be human to be otherwise. other-wise. But is your very first remark always about yourself, and Is it often made in a lightly critical, hichly sensitive tonet If the answer is yes, you're a bad wife. Even if the worst Is true, if Herbert Her-bert really is in love with the smart young grass-widow who handles real estate problems for the office even if he's all brightened up by a middle-aged love affair still you've nothing personal to say. Tcrsonal appeals, tears, hurt feelings, feel-ings, references to your excellencies as a wife all these don't count But an attitude of unselfish, cheerful cheer-ful usefulness, of interest in things that you like, of independent amusements and occupations, have won many a wandering spouse back to the domestic path. Don't take even your husband'i love affairs too seriously. |