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Show II: Get the hook! i 1 1 Tlio lishcs :iro here! I What a whopper! .you'll tell. 1,1 fat andpal ism is political antiquarian- I ism. I livery day 'II ,bo Suuda' or a IioJi - I, day after a while. A man niiiy he wortli millions and yet ' not worth inucli cls?c. If, What looked so beautiful as Old I Glory waved by tlio proud youngster? It seems that one good way to catch I a burglar is to first chase liini into the I'l cellar. i I," Moreover, if digns count for ans'thing, those Jowa '"regulars" don't look quite lii so chesty. t Dry farmers of Utah arc wondering if 1 the observer is keeping his proper I weather cj'o open. By this time it would seem that even I ' Speaker Cannon should bo able to cor- li ret'tl.y interpret the political handwrit- j ing on the wall. i; Today Salt Lake is to be captured by r a big bunch of big sheriffs; but wc feel y sure that they will iu turn bo captivated ij by their captive. ! But what's the use of attempting to j! transmute any base metal if into sil- h ver? Tho Government doesn't appear j ' lo want it for coinage, j ' President Taft thinks that Socialism j iircsents our greatest problem; but ho I doesn't think along the same lines as I do providers for big families, p Ft is a certainty that if there is go-ing go-ing to be a political fight tho Colonel ,, will be in-it if he is in the country. And . hos going fo be in the country, all f r'Cht l NTo wonder the Treasury Department looks upon paper money as tho most j valuable medium of exehaugi since fbo , wood-pulp trust got its hooks into the ! business. . Accordinc to Vice-President Sber man's political 'victory,, talk, whichever which-ever of tlio pugilists in the coming fight gets the walloping takes all the gate money. While the Treasury Department is av- ranging for the issuance of more small J; bills, the ultimate consumer is on the 1 lookout for means with which to pay j his bigger bills. i , ji Supposing that; the weatherman is l' not averse to public approval, it is j; mildly suggested :hat if ho happen lo S catch a rainstorm within reach he should grab it quick. ? ' ' Haying had a long talk with i Colonel "Roosevelt, Mr. Joseph Cham- lcrlain knows now just what to do." i3'S tho Boston Globe. Mayb'e not. fl M ay.be he knows now .just what ho is. ; Not so much that some of those ovor- I pnthusiati.e .New Yorkers desiro to proporly rccolve Teddy as -it is that they vvant. to show him that thoy are ' perfectly -vi Hi ng to eat out of his hand. If Senator Lodge has hilherlo boon unable to discover any particular capa-bility capa-bility in Apostlo-Scnator Smoot, he may prcsontly find that ho of the bifurcated title makes au effective hoodoo to have around. i Somo unkind person has suggested that if Apostle Grant is determined to H Ring ho should include in his training Hj n diet of bird seed. Hut having in Hf tniud the supcrjor vocal atiainmoiits of the "Rocky Mountain canary." perhaps per-haps tho better suggestion would bo that tho ambitious one board at a livery stable. |