Show MIt DOOLEY ON J i I EUROPEAN INTERVENTION Y BY F P DUNNE Copyright 1902 by Rob crt Howard Russell i bofurc th house Is iTh question which wan Iv th Mid Mr Dooley Europcen powers done mos fr us In th Spanish war I thought they was all again us said Mr Honnessy So did ro said Mr Dooley but I crool to done thlm an Injustice I was thlm clowned heads If It hadnt been make an I cant fr some wan power out which it was th Cublans today wud bo opprissed be th Castile Instead Iv bo th Beet Sugar Trust an th ITlllplnosti be shot be Mausers Instead Iv KragJorgcnsens Some wnn power slhretchcd out Its hand an said No no It suld thus far but no farther but We will not permit this misguided warrumhcartcd little people to be crushed be th ruffyan power Iv 1 Spain It said Never It said shall hlsthry record that th United Slates Iv Amoil ca ncatlln1 there In Its cosy raypubllc frm th Atlantic to th Piissyfle was dcsthroved an th hurtagc Iv liberty that 1 they robbed frm us wasted because be-cause we did not give thlm support It says An BO whin th future looked datkest whin we didnt imo whether th war wud last eight or be prolonged fr tin weary thmgjc mlnyuts whin Jt seemed as though th Spanish fleet wud not sink unless shotat some kindly kind-ly power was silently comfortln us an sayln to ItsIIf I do so hope theyll win If f they can But I dont know which wan It was At first I thought It was England Whlnicr yo hear Iv anny counthry helpln U5YO ° think It Jo England Thats because England s helped us so much in th past Says Lord Cran 1 burnc In reply t9 a question In th I House Iv J Commons I am reluctantly foorccd be mesllf to blushlnly admit that but fr us people on their way I to China today wud be getlln up an lookln over th side Iv th ship an sayln Tills Is whero America used to be Whin war was first discussed niesllf an th rest Iv 1 th famly met an decided that unless prompt action was took our cousins an Invlstmlnta acrost th sea wud be damaged beyond repair so we cabled > Lord Ponsyfoot togo to-go at wanst to th White House an Inform th Prisldint that we wud regard re-gard th war as a crool blot on civilization civili-zation and an ofilnse to th Intlllyglnce jv mankind I am glad to Bay our In thervlntlon was ifiycaclous War was Jmmeodjatcly declared I will not tell ye how high our hearts beat as we rread th news frm day to day Yo know I will ony say that we In sthiucted Lord Ponsyfoot to do ivry thlng In his power to help our kinsmen an hefaithfully ixlcutod his ordhcrs He practically lived at th Whlte House durln th thryln1 peeryod an his advice to th PrlsSdint such as It ie go on with this blnnyflclnt war Th United Powers will knock yeer head QfIt orr think I can secure favrable terms frm th1 Powers If yo will abdicate In favor Iv a rlprislntative iv th1 house iv Bourbon an cede New England to Spain done more thin annythlng else to put heart Into th American foorces i will add that dur in this time we was approached bo an ambassadure Iv wan 1 iv th Powers who ast us to Inthervene I will not say which Power It was eocclpt that Is was AusthryaHungary an Im prevlntcd be th obligations iv me office frm mlntlonln what Powers was behind th move beyond bin tin that they was as follows Germany France Rooshya Itly China Turkey Monaco San Marino Mar-ino BOolgahrya 1 Montlnaygro Booloo chlstan an Pershya Pahs reply to than th-an sS ure WAS I will dp all I can as ho kicked him down stairs It ill becomes me to say what else we done fr that home Iv freedom an hlvcn knows I wlsht Itd stay there an not bo wandherln over th face Iv th wurruldbut Im proud Iv me looks an I will remark that TIddy Roosonfclt was capably directed be th idltoru Iv England thlm hearts Iv oak that th American navy was advised be our mos inargetlc corryspondlnts an that to make th raysult certain we lint a few British ginrajs to th Spanish Cud frlndshlp go farther As they say in America I reckon be gosh not Well whin I read this speech I was prepared to hans thmedal fr savin1 life on th breasts Iv th hands acrost th sea where theres always plenty Iv hooks fr medals But th nex day I picks up th paaper un sees that twas not Engl rlq done It but Germany Yes sir twas Gennany Germany was our ony frlnd They was a time whin It looked as though she nas goin to shoot at us to keep us frm th consequences Iv I our rash act Thcyso nawthln Germany Ger-many wudclent do for or to a frlnd Yes It watt Germany But it was France too La Belle France was therewith there-with a wurrud Iv cncouragcmlnt an n glance Iv affection out Iv her dark eyeD that kcp growln darker as th war proceeded An it was Kooshya Whin th Czar hecrd Iv th war the first thing he Bald was Im sp sorry Who is I th United States An twas Itly an Booloochlstan Boolgahrya an even I Spain Spain was our rInd till th f I war was over Thin she rounded on us ansold us th Phjippincs I They was all our frlnds tin yet ony wan Iv thin was our frlnd How dye make It out Hlnnlssy Hogan has a fm lnt1tat onalsy lies th head that wears a ciown bu tit seems to be as nlsy tr sonic ly thlm as fr th mos Imm crltlc American But wholver It I was that saved us Im thankful to i I thlm It wont tdo fr ye to look at th map an suy that th powrful 1 protlc I tln nation wud bo hardly big enough f ro watch l charm fr a man frm Texas or that Euro ieen assistance fr I I AmericaJa about aauuoful as a crutch j Ir a footrunner But fr th Inthor vcntlpn lyour unkuqwn rind wedve beon annihilated Th Powers wudvo sot together an they wudve slnt over a fleet that wudvo been turrblo 1C Jt didnt blow up an th croww didnt I get seasick They wudvo slnt an Ir rcaistlblq nnrjny like th wan that is atom crushln th Boers with th Infirmities Infir-mities IVol age an flnly 1C all else failed thy wud rayfuso food Thats I BOln to lie lh unslxplctcd blow l Iv anny II war that th parishes iv Europe wages agin uq They rill decline to cat They I will starve us out an 1C left to their I own icsoorccs as Hogan says Europe I cud outslarvc America In a month Im not afraid iv thlm said Mr t I Hcnncaay Whin I was a young man acrost Ger runnln jump I cud take a many or Franco an as fr England wed hardly thrip over It In I th dark Perhaps yeer right said Mr Doo Icy But If all thlm grrcat Powers as they say thimsllves was fr to attack at-tack us dye know what Id do Ill tell ye Id blockade Armour an com pny an th wheat lllvutora Mlnny soty Fr Ulnnlsi I tell ye th hand that rocks th scales In th grocery 1 store lb th hand that rules th wurruld |