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Show BELLS; LI i THAT FUNNY FEELING II. v,;is Ui(! eve of tin1 j:i r! y, nnd yotin;; Jloltby w:M (.'on.sla nl ly thinking think-ing of Joys to coiiii. "Oh, ru ii in," In: said, "I do feel so -XfII c-.i I" "Kxclled, dear?" saiil his mother, realizing tin: aiu.se. "What is excited?" excit-ed?" "Why," wild tfi o liny, "It's being In n liurry ull over." London Answers. Empty A lawyer was endeavoring to Impress Im-press (lie court with the fact that his clients hud always been anxious l.o Bottle the case by agreement, "your Honor," fie said, "eighteen months ago we held out the olive branch." "Yes," responded the Judge, "hut (here were no olives on It." Boston Transcript. Fair Exchange lie leaned over the garden fence. "I say, old fellow," he said, "I understand un-derstand that you have Thomson's new rake." The neighbor nodded. "Good," said the first. "If you'll let mo borrow that occasionally, I'll let you use Jones' roller whenever you need It." Stray Stories. Con f CBsion Friend Doesn't it shock you to hear your daughter using expressions expres-sions like "Oh, h I?" Mother No, I envy her. I've wanted to use thorn myself a good many times, hut with my strict bringing up I just can't get up enough nerve to spit them out, I hough I do think them. Cincinnati Mnrjulrer. HOW IT WORKS Tom The rain falls alike on the Just and the unjust. Jack Yes, and they both get stuck In the mud. Very, Very Bad Di;i nne, nge seven, had just returned re-turned from a movie, and her aunt wanted to know how she liked it. "Oh, you ought to see it, auntie," said the child. "But if you go you better take a lot of handkerchiefs. It's awful sad one dies and two get married." Chicago News. His Own Uptown lie doesn't look like a hero, but he says he saved a man's life during the war. I wonder how he did it. Downtown Dodged the draft I presume. Border Cities Star. Facial Expression First Actor Why did they change the show from "Hamlet" to "ilac-bcth"? "ilac-bcth"? Second Actor The hero needed a shave and he didn't have the necessary neces-sary funds. Brooklyn Eagle. One Consolation "It must be dreadful for you to have your own son In jail for joyriding." joy-riding." "Anyhow, It's a comfort to know whore he Is at nights." Border Cites Star. Trim It Down Mrs. Dinks What I say never seems to bear fruit. Mr. Dinks It might If you pruned It a bit. |
