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Show dent of theology who happened to be taking the course in order to leant some of the rudiments of medicine, replied. "1. would administer the sacrament." sac-rament." What He la In. Visitor So your boy is in college, Is j he. Mr. Corntosslo?" Farmer I can't sp.v exactly. He's In I thor ba'l nine, an' In ther rowln' crev,'. an' In ther jlmnayzeeum, an' in ther dommytory, but whether he's ever in I ther college is niore'n 1 kin And out I by bis letters." Harcr's Bazar. i No Harm Done. "Great heavens!" cried the drug clerk. "What's wrmg?" asked the druggist. drug-gist. "I gave that boy hair tonic instead of conch syrup." "Never mind. We make a profit of 90 per cent on each." Chicago Record-Herald. Got His at Home. Singleton Are you going to all cud the lecture at the hnll tonight? Wedderly Not me. Singleton Why not? Wedderly What's the use of a married mar-ried man giving up money to hear a lecture Chicago N'"W5, Enthusiasm. Anxious Messenger Say. fireman, there's another fire broken out up the street. New Recruit All right, old cbsp; keep her going till we've finished this one. Punch. i JUST FOR FUN An Accommodating Clerk. '. I'p-to the night clerk's desk goes Abe Perlmutter, a Chicago traveling i man. "I wonder." he 6ays, "could you I find me somebody to play a game or I pcnuchle for aa hour or two tonight?" j "Why," gays the clerk. "I guess so." ) 'And he runs hl3 eye- over the register. ' ! "Boy," he calls. M'page Mr. Gutwilllg." lucforo long Mr. GutwlUlg Is found and. ! Introduced to the ponuchle-hungry Perlmutter, and a game Is arranged. 1 "How did you know I played pt-' pt-' michlo?" Mr. Gutwilllg asks the cle-rk. . "Oh " begins tho clork. Just ', then emerges from the bar a yonng i : man Irlple-plled with wine. He stag- ' gers up to the dk and says: "Shay. I wanna fight! D'ye hear? I'm lookln' f'r a scrap!" Thus the clerk: "Boy, pago Mr. Kelly Kel-ly and Mr. O'Brien. Success. , She Meant Well. The young son of a Western family fam-ily was away from home for hla first year In college. His mother had been to visit him, and upon her return met a friend, who asked if her hoy was 1 homesick. ' , "No," said the doting mother. "I was afraid he would he. so I saw that he was located in one of the best ma-teroliy ma-teroliy houses of the college." Llp-j.lncott'8. Llp-j.lncott'8. !i He Knew. "What would you do if a patient was taken with a serious case of appen-dlcltJs?" appen-dlcltJs?" asked the professor of one of his classes in physiology. A stu- |