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Show j Dorothy Dix Says : Matrimony has enough chances of misery in it without turn- ; ing it into a reform school. ; By DOROTITY DIX, The World's Highest Paid Woman Writer j; I have received a letter from a man who writes: u have read and re-road your aril ar-il tides on "The Folly of a Girl Marry-Llnp Marry-Llnp a Man to Reform Mm." Is tho girl's folly a great a that of the man who marries a girl to roform hor? ,. "I am In lovo with a beautiful and 1 fascinating young woman who lacks Ideala of morality, and who permit fa-'mlllarltlos fa-'mlllarltlos from men that no roepect-able roepect-able Klrl should tolerate. If I marry this girl do you think that I can correct cor-rect her faults and change her Into being the kind of woman I would want f for a wife and the mother of my cull-I cull-I dron?" I Frankly, no. Such a miracle might happen once in a million timos, but not of toner, and the odds are too great against such a marriage turning out well to make It even a gambler's gamble. It has been said that the woman drunkard, or drug fiend, or the Immoral Immor-al woman never reforms. This Is not true, but undoubtedly It Is much hard-I hard-I er to win the woman who has taken tho wrong turn of the road back Into the straight and narrow path than It Is to win a man back. This Is because when a woman falls Bhe not only goes deeper down Into , the pit than a man does, but all the forces of society push hor down farther far-ther and farther Into the mlro, while they hold out helping hands for the man. We condone the offenso of tho Vmnn who has sinned and reputed, but I we hold the woman's slip against hor i r. yn-r tvntr rlnv Wn filn flirt fnttswt cnlf when tho prodigal son cleanses himself and returns home, but nobody even hands out a broadod veal chop to the prodigal daughter when she comes back. I And the man who Is proposing to marry a woman whoso skirts have the mud of the street on them will do well to remember that, whllo ho may bo big enough and noble onough to forgive for-give and forget her past the world never will. Society has a short memory mem-ory for a woman's virtues, but a long ono for her frailties. In discussing tho possibility of reforming re-forming a woman, it is well to boar in mind that there are two distinct types of feminine sinners. There is tho girl who has blundered Into wrong doing through Ignorance, through Innocence, In-nocence, through loving not wisely, but too well, through somo desperate need of poverty or want. Many a girl has been betrayed by tho highest and best and tonderest lmpulsos In hor whole nature. Such .girls as these keep thoir souls I whito In spite of tho black stain on V,. their lives. They hate and loathe everything ev-erything that even savors of Immorality, Immoral-ity, and they yearn with an unspeak-ablo unspeak-ablo longing to be within tho fold of conventional and respectable society. No man need be afraid of how such a woman as this will conduct herself aftor marrlago. She will need none of her husband's reforming, for sho will roform herself. Her horror of what she has boon through -will make her llko Caesar's wife. On tho other hand, there Is the girl n.Vin to nA nt VionTf fill nf TpViftao im. pulses aro of tho flesh, fleshy, and who drifts just as naturally downward as water rolls down a hill. Sho needs no temptation to luro her, because in her own nature sho possesses every temptation to ovll. You cannot reform such a woman, because sho does not want to bo reformed. re-formed. You cannot protect her from evil men. because sho Is a magnet that draws them to her. You cannot teach her to run straight, because her very naturo is crooked. Every curve of her body is tho lino of least resistance. A man is a fool, and worse than a fool, If ho deliberately lots himself lntoi l lifelong misery by marrying n woman Jpvof this type. Ho delivers himself overl to shamo, for, sooner or later, herj name will be a mocking in ttfo mouths of men, and in tho meantime he is "a prey to tho gnawing jealousy thati v oats out our hearts when wo aro filled with suspicions of ono we lovo and Whom wo know that wo cannot trust. Just notice tho look of furtive watchfulness watch-fulness on tho face of tho wife of a reformed drunkard when tho cocktails aro passed at dinner. It is enough to make you "weep, It) is so full of anguished an-guished anxiety. Watch tho black scowl on tho face ,'of tho man whoso wifo has "been talked about" before they wero married, as sho engages in a whispered conversation with some good-looking man. There is murder in the look. There is mo fec nor happiness there, and there never is in tho household house-hold where cithor .tho husband or -wife has been roformed for there must bo honor and faith between husband and wifo to make an (ideal marriage, and that does not cxvst where either one bns a past that hn!jS had to be forgiven, and habits and ideals that have had to bo changed. After all. tho same argument applies to the man who thinks of marrying a girl to roform hor that doos to the girl who marries a man to roform him. Why do anything so UBeIo68 as well as dangerous? Why pick out a specked peach when tho basket is full of sound ones? Why not choose the kind of a wife or husband hus-band you want, to start with, Instead of taking an inferior article on tho chance that you may posslblo bo ablo to alter It over Into something of which you approve? Matrimony has onough chances of misery in It without turning It into a roform school, and whllo It may be good for our souls to have our faults corrected and our weaknesses eliminated elimi-nated and our habits changed, It Is an almighty unpleasant process for tho poor victim who Is being raised up to the higher life. Finally, this cold, hard face Is recommended rec-ommended to the consideration of tho foolhardy who are marrying life partners part-ners to make them better It 1b ndt on record that the Inmntes of reformatories reformator-ies entertain any very ardent affection for those who arc attempting to reform them. |