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Show Chatter Box . Dear Suzy, In the spring a young man's i fancy lightly turns to thoughts of how' to get out of the gardening work the little woman has outlined outlin-ed for him. and these thoughts came to a climax this past week when the Anti-Gardening and -Heavy Work Club, a non-cooperative venture, was organized under the able leadership of Lee Davis. Lee was picked because of his novel nov-el and plentitude of excuses for avoiding the pitfalls of homework. H" merely states to his wife when the gardening question is brought up. "someone ran over a cat at Cove Fort and I will have to take the equipment out to remove it: I will be back in six weeks." If that fniln he has a million more excuses. Eddie Lyman was made the vice-president vice-president because he can also display dis-play some nifty footwork in outguessing out-guessing his wife and can be relied re-lied upon, when, as he tells his wife he is going to the farm, he ends up at the reservoir. Here he joins those master shirkers, Loke Petersen, Hon Cropper, Frank S. Eeckwith and Max Hannifin. Van Bishop has been made the corresponding - secretary as the members feel he has some very vital suggestions to make them as to how to keep the women homev. busy and happy. He has succeeded so well in this line he was made the unanimous choice for that position. po-sition. He reports that applications for membership are swamping him and if it keeps up the club will have to install units in all of the towns of west Millard, especially Lynndyl, where the men have set a record for no absenteeism from railroad work since the gardening bug bit their wives. The club voted to bar a few men from membership as they hadn't shown the "right attitude," according to club standards. Heading Head-ing this list is Clayton Stapley, who I once, in an unguarded moment said, "I like gardening." Since that epic remark of his women have chanted it so many times to their husbands that it sounds like a phonograph record that got stuck. Clay has even gone so far as to work on Sunday when people could see him. Em Moody is on the i black list because he has been observed ob-served puttering about the home doing what could just as easily be done by a woman. Ward Moody also al-so is in the bad graces of the club for raking up some leaves and going go-ing so far at one time to mow the lawn when his wife, Olive and Jeneal were all home. Jan Wright, Mont Works and Albert Skidmore are permanently in the black list for their garden work in the years past and singing their praises has become the theme song of the Delta Garden Club. Archie Barben is crowding for high honors in the club membership member-ship for his brilliance in carrying out the orders of his wife. She told him to dig a ditch and Arch carried out the order very well, but dug it right through the middle of the lawn. This caused his wife the extra ex-tra work of covering up the ditch, planting new lawn and then digging dig-ging the ditch where she wanted it in the first place. This type of "cooperation" wins considerable backing in the club and they feel that more of this will put the new organization on a solid basis in the community. Solid with them means comfortably on the seats of their pants. A joint meeting of the new club and the Thornton Sunshine and Social So-cial club is planned in the very near future. The TSSC, headed by Jody Sampson and Henry Watts, has ably proved over a long period of years that a man can live vith-out vith-out working and their findings will be of great benefit to the neophytes neo-phytes in the AGHWC, who will need all the help they can get to carry out their project of not carrying carry-ing out their project. One fly in the ointment is the seed catalogs that women have a faculty for gathering up in the spring. It is felt by the men that if they can get a "cooperating" member in the Delta postoffice to "lose" these catalogs half their battle will be won. A woman with a seed catalog, according to the AGHWC, is a very dangerous person per-son and should be avoided at all costs. They feel that seed catalogs have forced more couples on a nodding nod-ding acquainance than any other foreign influence in the homes, and they they should be barred for being be-ing "breakers uppers" of homes. The club has adopted the motto, "peace at home, and let the smoth- erweed grow where it may." It is going to be interesting to see how the "irresistible force" comes out when it meets the "immovable object." ob-ject." I am afraid that a lot of the theories of physics are going to take a beating. Keeping husbands busy, that obsession ob-session with women, was given a new twist last week by Loretta Whicker. Wally got to going up town nights and coming home smelling of coca-cola and candy bars which upset his good wife no end. Her solution had the master touch of genius. She ran an ad saying that Wally repaired clocks, or something or other and now Wally is so busy repairing whatever what-ever it was the ad said that he will soon have to quit his regular job to take care of his sideline. Now Wally climbs into bed in an exhausted state, his breath untainted un-tainted with cokes and candy, and his wife happy with the thoughts of how she out-foxed him. Well, they say marriage is just a gamble, but it is a cinch that there will never be a dull minute for either party when gardening is brought up. The little woman will lay awake nights trying to think of how to get the gardening done, and the old man will lay awake nights thinking of ways to avoid it. I guess if it weren't for us women wo-men the men would live in a maze of weeds, empty car.r.. planning countless fishing and hunting trips. A referee, if needed, Toots |
