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Show ( JUST STUFF " Sometimes I think men ought to be shot not often, but every now and then. And the other night I had my gun ready! I decided to surprise my boyfriend, Kraig the other night and fix him a candlelight dinner. He had a computer project he was working on, so I knew he wouldn't be home from class until at least JB:00 p.m. that was plenty of time for me to get to his place and whip up a surprise dinner. I picked out an easy enough hamburger delight recipe, went shopping and got all the goods for my candlelight surprise. To finagle a key, I told him I'd meet him at his place at 8:00, and if I got there early, I'd just watch TV. The plot worked; he didn't suspect a thing. I got to his place in plenty of time. Mixed up the hamburger, crumbled the bread, mixed in the egg. The meat loaf even "loafed" just right. I put a nice tablecloth on the table, it was even freshly ironed! I used a set of nice dishes and even dragged my good silver along! The table looked gorgeous, if I do say so myself. The candles and soft music were the final touch. Talk about romantic! My "Brocolli Surprise", a brocolli wrapped in meatloaf, looked and smelled like a chef's delight. The vegies were cooked to perfection, cooked, but not mushy. And the "Stir and Frost cake ; had that air of being home made. And it was all done by 7 : 59 not a minute too soon or so I thought! I anxiously awaited the sound of his car. But the only sound I heard was the coo-coo clock ticking off the minutes. I knew from past experience, that he'd be a few minutes late, but when the clock "coo-cooed" 8:30 my anticipation started waning. I also noticed along with my anticipation waning, the vegies started mushing. When the clock struck 9:00, 1 had read the "Enquirer" twice, the comics three times, and had added fresh ice cubes to the water. I checked the meat loaf. My delicious delight was drastically deteriorating, instead of a nice, light brown loaf, I had a near-black, dried up meat lump. My vegetables didn't resemble vegies, more like orange-green gush globs. My fruit salad, left to "set" in the fridge, was well past the jiggley jello stage and was moving on to becoming another variety of globular goo that was once dinner. When the little birdie popped out of the clock and told me it was 10:00, I just about pulled him out of his little peep hole. Somewhere between the 10:00 o'clock coo-coo and my deciding to pack up shop, dinner and all, the phone rang. "Hi, how's TV?" "Fine," I said, keeping my composure "I don't suppose you're still hungry, are you?" "Well," he said "A little, not much. I grabbed a sandwich a bit ago." Then and there it could have been open seaon on all men! Needless to say, when Kraig finally got home, the ice was all melted, the candles had long since burned out and my romantic music had fade dinto the last strains of "M A S H" on the TV. But Kraig claimed my partially palatable dinner was delicious what more could he say? |
